The thought of meeting his whole family scares me - is that normal??

by Super_Becka 25 Replies latest social relationships

• 

  jgnat

  Yes, yes, yes!

  maybe I'll be a little less careful this time and see what I can learn, like an experiment.

  I do approach the people at the hall as future "material", as one day I will write a book. They all are such very interesting characters. I look for covert body language, unusual reactions, mannerisms. Pioneers are DEFINITELY more aggressive. Perhaps it is a strain to get all that time in.

  Ideas?

  • I kind of like the "twigs in the hair" business.
  • If someone IS more aggressive, ask, "Are you a Pioneer? How interesting. Are you counting your time with me?" Again, your active curiosity will save you from being offensive.
  • I offended a JW gathering simply by ignoring the advice of an elder while playing a board game. I take it elders aren't challenged very often.
  • Keep referring to the Kingdom Hall as a "church", and elders as "priests".

  I wonder, too, if the family started to worry about your boyfriend's seemingly eternal virginity. Perhaps their secret fear is that he likes boys better than girls, and you are a big relief.

  I adore Newfies. Every one I've met has embraced me on the spot. We've got lots in Alberta.
• 

  DaveNwisconsin

  Make sure you wear that Diamond studded Cross he bought you. They will leave you alone then. Try singing Silent Night, that works too!
• 

  Super_Becka

  Make sure you wear that Diamond studded Cross he bought you. ; They will leave you alone then

  Heh, I think he'd poke his own eyes out before he'd touch a cross, but that's not a bad idea, I should look for my cross pendant, I have one kicking around here somewhere. And if all else fails, I'll certainly go get a new one, a nice, big, shiny, gold cross. That should get me some great looks from a crowd of JWs.

  I wonder, too, if the family started to worry about your boyfriend's seemingly eternal virginity. Perhaps their secret fear is that he likes boys better than girls, and you are a big relief.

  I adore Newfies. Every one I've met has embraced me on the spot. We've got lots in Alberta.

  Hehehe, probably, but then again, his younger brother is 23 and has never dated before, either. I think they're just all socially stunted, they don't have social lives and don't even know how to talk to girls, much less ask them out. I think I am a great relief to them, though, they're all quite excited that my guy is finally dating someone.

  Aww, jgnat, we love you, too!! If I was meeting you in person, the first thing I'd do is give you a big hug, that's how we Newfies greet people, and probably a kiss on the cheek, too. Alberta is pretty full of Newfies, too, I think there are more out there than there are here on the island!!

  -Becka :)
• 

  Gretchen956

  Prepare to be love-bombed. They will be so lovey dovey and nice to you, and try to steer you around to their "witnessing" mode, hell, you are a captive audience for those short on their field service time for the month! And I love jgnat's suggestions, kinda evil like myself. However I have to warn you as nice as they can/will be to your face, they will do everything possible to break you up if they think you are too evil for their son, brother, cousin, etc.

  Good luck. I wouldn't go with a JW for all the money in the world. You are a brave lady.

  Sherry
• 

  Super_Becka

  Prepare to be love-bombed. ; They will be so lovey dovey and nice to you, and try to steer you around to their "witnessing" mode, hell, you are a captive audience for those short on their field service time for the month! ; And I love jgnat's suggestions, kinda evil like myself. ; However I have to warn you as nice as they can/will be to your face, they will do everything possible to break you up if they think you are too evil for their son, brother, cousin, etc.

  Good luck. ; I wouldn't go with a JW for all the money in the world. ; You are a brave lady.

  Heh heh heh, they can love-bomb me all they want to, I'm immune to it. That's part of having low self-esteem, it makes you question a person's motives for expressing interest and especially love, and besides, I've heard lots of stories on this board about how love-bombing works, they won't get to me.

  I also won't be engaging in any discussions about religion, that's a can of worms that I wouldn't want to open with traditional Christian family, much less a family full of JWs. There are only two things that I won't argue about, and those are politics and religion. And from what I can gather here, unless you agree with everything they say, there's no sense in talking religion with a bunch of JWs, they're too brainwashed to think outside the box.

  If they like me, fine, if they think I'm evil, fine, it doesn't bother me what they think. The only thing that matters to me is what my boyfriend thinks. Sure, I'd like for his family to like me, but if they don't, then it's their loss. And if what they think of me has a serious effect on what my boyfriend thinks of me, then he's not worth my time. If he decides that he doesn't like me because his family doesn't approve of me, then maybe he doesn't deserve me anyway. Harsh but true.

  Heh, I wouldn't call dating a JW "brave", I'd call it foolhardy. I'm out of my mind, dating a JW, I should never have bothered, but alas, once again, I'm listening to my heart, not my head, and so I find myself in this situation. I have a sneaking suspicion that this relationship isn't going to end well, but that's a chance I'm willing to take. I'm hooked on my guy and if it leads to heartbreak, so be it. Part of me tells me to get out while I can, but I can't just drop this without knowing how it ends, it's like reading a book and skipping the last chapter. Maybe I'm just a glutton for punishment.

  Brave, no. Stupid, yes.

  -Becka :)
• 

  jojochan

  I'm out of my mind, dating a JW, I should never have bothered, but alas, once again, I'm listening to my heart, not my head, and so I find myself in this situation. I have a sneaking suspicion that this relationship isn't going to end well, but that's a chance I'm willing to take. I'm hooked on my guy and if it leads to heartbreak, so be it. Part of me tells me to get out while I can, but I can't just drop this without knowing how it ends, it's like reading a book and skipping the last chapter. Maybe I'm just a glutton for punishment.

  Brave, no. Stupid, yes.

  Not stupid my dear...just in love, the nasty but sweet four letter word.

  I wish the best for you.

  jojochan.