Protect your sanity and self-respect. Run away, and very fast!
im in love with a Jehovah's Witness
by saddler 66 Replies latest social relationships
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saddler
Ive been reading through alot of posts on here and quite a lot say run away. But this girl dose preach to me about her religion i work with her and have done for the past 8 years and she is kind , caring and above all she has a sense of hummer and i cant see that running away from her just becouse of her religion will benafit either of us. i admit i am in love with the girl not her religion and would be alot happyer if she was not a J/W but she is and i would like to find a way sometime in the future to take her away from it. so with that in mind here is a question to all the EX J/W's that read these posts WHAT MADE YOU LEAVE THE RELIGION ? WAS IT FOR LOVE OF A NON BELIVER ? WAS IT BECOUSE YOU WERE KICKED OUT ? OR SOME OTHER REASON i would like to know if anyone wants answer. thanks again for all your advice.
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carla
Saddler,
I think you are not understanding the situation completely. You may be in love with the girl and not her 'religion'. However, you do not understand that her religion controls nearly every aspect of her life. How she may dress, what to read, who her friends are, holiday, household decorations and knick-knacks, games you may play, what to watch or not, even her underwear can come under the elders notice! Should you marry her at some point to you realize the organization (org) can and does dictate how you can make love to your spouse? From what positions are acceptable, to what goes on between the sheets, to even how much passion is allowable or proper. Do you really want to live like this? With a bunch of old men in Brooklyn running your life via your spouse?
If it was simply her believing one thing and you another that would be a different story. That isn't the way it is in jw's, it is the control one comes under by being a member. It does not only affect the jw member but entire families.
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saddler
thankyou for your post carla and i understand what you are saying and when i next see my sweetheart ill ask the question would she let the elders dictate our marridge, would the elders try and dictate my life, and would she go against them for the sake of our happyness, thanky again for giving me the oppertunity to ask her questians that i would not have thought of
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carla
Do yourself another favor before you even ask her about marriage and what can or cannot go on--PLEASE research 'theocratic warfare'. Just google it, theocratic warfare and jw's.
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jgnat
WHAT MADE YOU LEAVE THE RELIGION ? WAS IT FOR LOVE OF A NON BELIVER ? WAS IT BECOUSE YOU WERE KICKED OUT ? OR SOME OTHER REASON
Now, this is a gross generalization, but I think that most leave only after they have personally experienced a deep betrayal. Basically, they finally wake up that this is not the kind and benevolent organization they've been led to believe.
A word about Jehovah's Witnesses. Most are very embarrassed about some of the more extreme requirements of the religion. They are going to try and soft-pedal that aspect of their beliefs so that it doesn't seem so bad to you. Elders, too, will probably suggest that some reports of their requirements are overstated.
Are you really ready to give up the prospect of children? Your sweetheart's reaction is very JW, by the way. Why have children when "the end" is any day now?
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jgnat
Ask to borrow her copy of "The Secret of Family Happiness" book and read the section on "Unbelieving Mates." That should give you some more questions to ask.
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SPAZnik
Why, pray tell, has it taken you 8 years?
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Poodles
I'm in love with a Jehovah's Witness as well! We have been in this relationship for the past seven years! He was always happier then i because he was/is hiding me from his entire family including his ex-wife! I broke it off once about 1 1/2 years ago but we make up two weeks later!! I would like to hear your thoughts on this subject, good or bad!!
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Dr Jekyll
Poodles, Dump the jerk, can't you see when you are being used?