Please Give Constructive Criticism

by collegegirl21 22 Replies latest social relationships

  • Brigid
    Brigid

    Sweetie,

    Am I free to comment here? I will not divulge anything that you do not wish me to, but I have things I'd like to say. You may email me or pm me if you'd prefer a less open forum.

    Love and Light,

    ~Brigid

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce
    ...it sounds to me he is not a very reliable person....

    no shit sherlock yes that is so true!

    so exactly where is fred the love cat hall?

  • JUG
    JUG
    "Take the time now to have buddies, freinds to pass the ti me."

    Yeh that and he lied to you if he'll lie about one thing he'll lie about another. Trust me you dont need freinds like that and you realy don't need to be dating some one like that. Find someone you can trust, but take some time to find out if they truly can be trusted before you commit. Thats what dating is for.

  • daystar
    daystar

    stilla

    I had an internet relationship -it did not work

    Me too once. However, that person also ended up being one of the best friends I've ever had in my life. So, I'm not so down on meeting people online at all. You just have to understand that the logistics are different out here than when you meet someone in person.

    I've had many more in-person relationships fail than online ones. There have simply been more of them.

  • Frog
    Frog

    heya cgg, sounds like you need supportive and understanding friends right now more than you need a relationship. there'll be plenty of time for that down the track, in the meantime you've got alot of growing to do and a great many hurdles to overcome re your decision to fade from the org. x

  • G Money
    G Money

    I've seen too much deception and lies from people online. Its best to have relationships where you can see the person regularly.

    You want to see them in their own environment. Being with somebody far away is always like being on vacation with them and you never really get to know them. To truly know someone you need to see how they dress, see how they live and how their friends, family and coworkers treat them. It all has to be spontaneous or you'll never get to know them.

    You seem like a nice girl with a great smile and I bet there are many quality guys lined up around the block to go out with you very close to where you live.

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    Just be careful, that's all I can say... of course we don't know who it is you are talking about and he could be the greatest guy in the world, or you may have spooked him out a bit or he got impatient, or maybe he's a bit imature.... whatever... but here is a story of someone I just dated on the internet...

    Things started going a bit hazy and she started acting strange, she thinks he drugged her, and he took her to what he said was his house, but when they got there, it was like a show home on a building site. He gave her more drink and she thought she was going to pass out, managed fortunately to tip the rest of the drink into a pot and get away.

    Very scary stuff.

  • collegegirl21
    collegegirl21

    Thank you all soo much for your comments. I think after reading this and after getting a review from my boss at work today, I have a lot of growing and learning about myself that I need to do. I am going to be honest, I miss talking to him, but I know that I have all of you here if I need people and I have friends from school. I will try and let it go and hope that he had a safe trip and that he's ok. Thanks again everyone!

  • loathjw
    loathjw

    He got disfellowshipped and he's busy having the best sex in his life. Let him enjoy himself.

  • Oroborus21
    Oroborus21

    howdy,

    I don't think you need "criticism" of any sort. You are entitled to your feelings and own interpretation of events. it is nice to cut people some slack though and I usually urge people to give others the benefit of the doubt until you have some confirmation of facts or an explanation. So my only comment to you re: your handling of the situation would be to reserve some judgment until he has a chance to give you an explanation of why his plans changed.

    As for myself the biggest thing in life that I hate is a broken promise. But that is just me. i would rather a person not promise something then to promise and break it. Of course things happen and not everything promised can be kept always but then the explanation for why the promise wasn't kept should be appropriate and if provided makes the situation fine.

    However, before concluding I did want to tell you one thing. The problem that I see with this relationship has nothing to do with religion or his lying, or anything at all. The biggest problem is that of the long-distance relationship. You say that he is moving to California, so unless you are also relocating from WI you are going to have a problem cultivating any kind of meaningful relationship. Long-distance relationships are the rarest of all species of love-relationships and I don't need to tell you that successful ones are against all odds. Perhaps it would be better if you avoided surrendering much of your heart or developing too intimate a relationship until the problem of proximity might be resolved.

    best wishes,

    Eduardo

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