JH.........
My thoughts and prayers are with you at this time.
It was my dad's birthday 2 months ago, and I said happy birthday to him and gave him a gift. Since I became a witness many years ago, I never said happy birthday to him, just ignored saying it, but 2 months ago, I did and gave him a gift. He didn't expect it, and was happy.
I understand because I ignored my Dad for too many years. I'm just glad that I got close to my Dad the last few years of his life and wish I could have gone back 30 more. I bought him something on his birthdays and he was happy. His love for me was always there. I'm just so sorry that for so many years......I though of him as nothing because he wasn't a dub.
JH......cherish every moment you can at this time. You will get through this. I'll help you buddy. And so will many others here.
HappyDad