Contact from my JW brother-in-law

by sass_my_frass 23 Replies latest jw friends

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  PoppyR

  I am very sorry for this, it must really hurt.

  However you know by now that the love JWs have is based on conditions. You will probably not reach them in any way, I would be inclined to continue with the emails though, and just say you hope he'll change his mind.

  I also feel non JWs have NO idea that we are treated in this way by our families and it's a great way to make sure they show no interest in the cult! Just forward the email on and ask if anyone else is 'offended' and apologise and ask if they would rather not be emailed either.

  Also enjoy your new relationships. It's SO good to finally have some that are based on real love, real affection, and although it never quite replaces what you've lost with your family, its REAL.

  I have few contacts and friends that are not witnesses, but they are individually worth 100 of each JW because I know they would have my back whatever I did.. if I made a dreadful mistake and went out and did the worst possible thing, they would support me because they love me. It's a good feeling. Remember that every time you look at your new husband, he loves you unconditionally. Enjoy!

  Poppy
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  buffalosrfree

  my advice would be to forward his reply to the rest of the family so that can see what a twit he is.
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  kgfreeperson

  I'm with buffalosrfree! Do a reply all (then add as many addresses as you can think of that you can legitimtely send this to), write something bright and cheerful--but don't make any reference to his reply. He'll write telling you to cut it out. Do a reply all, as if there's nothing at all strange about this, relaying more great news. How many times you have to do this will depend on how long it takes him to figure it out. With any luck, you'll be able to do it several times, cementing the JWs reputation with the non-JWs and, probably, getting you all kinds of kindly support from the non-JWs among your family and friends.
  
  Accepting the basic jerkitude of your family is a terribly hard thing to do and you have my utmost sympathy.
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  merfi

  Please bear with me while I analyse this. Firstly; 'public forum'? The only names they knew on the email list were other siblings and our parents. Secondly; 'respect'? They want me to respect them for being loveless, hurtful and, somebody please give me some good words for what they're being? It's been a few weeks since I sent the email so they've probably all consulted and discussed how to handle this situation. How inconsiderate of me!
  
  
  

  I kind of knew it would happen, but thought they even if they have no love at all, they still might want to keep receiving them so that they can pretend to our non-JW family that they care what happens to us and avoid giving them the impression that they are, those words I can't think of. Maybe the tone of the emails were so upbeat and cheerful that they picked up on the general vibe on my life now; they might have got it sussed that I'm actually happy and can't handle it. More likely, they just feel compelled to play the JW game and don't see anything wrong with it.

  
  

  
  I haven't yet read what everyone else has said... My reaction would be to write to him what you just wrote here.

  (((hugs))) this sucks. :(

  ~merfi

  Oh yeah, and -- if he doesn't want emails from you, he can always just block your addy. It's not up to YOU to stop communication, the stupid shunning rule is his, not yours....