Is God still in control of WHAT?
your life?
the world?
the wt org?
WHAT?
Special Announcement and Memorial Talk Outline
by Elsewhere 37 Replies latest jw friends
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ballistic
Arrangements will be made for a qualified Christian minister to visit you
Arrangements will be made for a unqualified window cleaner to visit you -
Gregor
Ballistic, LOL, you bad boy!
"If anyone requires transportation to the UFO airport, please put on a black robe and your Nike tennis shoes, complimentary Kool Aid will be served at the gate. Please don't be late, the Hale Bopp comet won't be around again for a long time"
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heathen
I can't wait to see what this announcement is about . They will no doubt twist it to mean are you letting the book publishing corporation run your life . If not then you are the satan worshipper .
I may even check this memorial thingy out tonight just to see what else is up their sleeve.
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undercover
The many visitors here this evening are to be commended for showing appreciation for this most sacred occasion. You can also be sure that Jehovah God and Jesus Christ are pleased that you put forth the effort to be here. We sincerely want to help you draw close to God and his Son and to enjoy an approved standing with them. In this regard, we are pleased to announce that anyone present who would like more information may obtain a free personal Bible study by speaking to one of the attendants. Arrangements will be made for a qualified Christian minister to visit you at a time and place that is convenient for you. In addition, we would like to invite all to attend a special Bible discourse that will be presented on Sunday, April 30. [Provide time and location of the meeting. If your congregation has its Public Meeting on a different day, mention the appropriate day and date.] This talk, entitled “Is God Still in Control?” will be presented worldwide by Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Good catch, Elsewhere, on the "who is in control" bit.
But I noticed this about the announcement itself:
we are pleased to announce that anyone present who would like more information may obtain a free personal Bible study by speaking to one of the attendants. Arrangements will be made for a qualified Christian minister to visit you at a time and place that is convenient for you.
In years past they've always had a similar announcment but I remember the speaker always saying, "if you would like more information, blah, blah, you can ask any one of Jehovah's Witnesses in attendance tonight...blah, blah, blah." Notice now that they instruct you to seek out an attendant. (How does one tell an attendant apart from all the other suits?) And the instructions from the WTS say to not paraphrase the announcement. Hmmm, makes you wonder... -
inbyathread
God IS in Control. It is the WTS that lost it many years ago.
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What-A-Coincidence
you guys are freakin funny man. Keep it up!!!
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PoppyR
I've just come back, and that announcement was bigged up! It was like ooooh, a special announcement direct from the society, drum roll please.. silence... Then exactly the same crap they say every year.
Interestingly though, not that many in attendance, just the same old tired relatives and faded ones that are always there.
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ballistic
We sincerely want to help you draw close to God and his Son and to enjoy an approved standing with them.
We sincerely want to brainwash you to draw close to The Watchtower Bable and Crap Society and to enjoy a Governing Body approved standing with them. -
Mary
Finally Free said: Serves you right for going.
Ah, ya cheeky l'il bastard........I'm a comin' back aftewards and posting my findings here!! Stay tuned! Don't turn this channel!!