LONG...Call with Dad after nullification

by unique1 15 Replies latest jw experiences

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  sass_my_frass

  The concept of an annullment is that whatever it is you are declaring annulled is declared to have never happened. For instance, if you get a marriage annulled, the marriage is declared to have never existed. Basically, legally, there was never a marriage in the first place, so after an annulled marriage, you cannot technically say you were ever married. The same would go for baptism annullment. If the baptism is annulled, then you were never a JW.

  ... A lot of people seem to be confusing the WBTS with the legal system. Honestly, I can't say I've ever heard of a 'baptism annulment'. And it's not like you would be able to get the legal system to impose one. You didn't sign a contract when you got baptised, you just went through a religious ceremony. It really sounds like something that people just want to be able to do; but you can't make up the rules for an organisation that does so for itself. Their rule is: 'get letter saying 'don't want to be a witness'; make them no longer a witness. That's done by announcement saying you're no longer a witness.
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  jwfacts

  Sorry to hear that, it is terrible being shunned.

  When I told a friend at work about my first shunning experience she said if anyone shunned me in front of her she would go up and slap them.
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  Honesty

  I got shunned at a Mexican restaurant for the first time by them on Saturday. There was a huge group of us. They couldn’t believe what I was telling them. They were like surely your parents will stop by and say hi. They didn’t and all my friends were shocked!!! They said, sounds like a cult. I just smiled.

  What a witness!!!

  No wonder actions speak louder than words. I bet the next time your friends spot the JW's 'working' their street they will have a lot of good thought-provoking questions to ask them. I would if I had seen this 'fine witness' by God's righteous people.
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  Balsam

  Something that always bothered me was shunning or the act of shunning someone in public. Like when I was studying back in 1971 and attended the KH. There was a young woman with a baby maybe 9 months old. I noticed right away that everyone avoided talking to her. I noticed that no one would offer to give her a hand during the meetings with her baby if he was crying. I asked the lady I studied why no one spoke to her or was helpful. They were helpful to everyone else why not her. That is when I got my first experience with disfellowshipped people. Back then for fornication it was a straight 7 years of disfellowshipping. I would get up and speak to her in the bathroom when I saw her walk out. She was terrified that someone would see me speaking to her. Finally my study conductor was afraid it would end the bible study and started assisting this young woman with her baby. The girl was go grateful she started crying. Had my study conductor continued ignoring this poor girl that would have done it with me. But she really help her taking the baby during the meetings and such. But eventually even my thinking was affected and I found my self shunning ones I didn't really care for anyway. It still bothers me that I shunned anyone ever, but I did. I really believed that God required it of me, till a dear friend was disfellowshipped. Then I thought this is just cruel, and I won't do it.

  Unique1 your a brave young woman, and you have really been put through so much crap by your Mother, and your Dad just let her mistreat you emotionally all your life. Honey I know you don't feel it, but your better off without them in your life. Your Mom is the queen of snide remarks, put downs and is down right rude to those she doesn't approve of. She puts self-righteousness out there like it's something to be proud of. I know you've said before she would be no big loss, its your Dad you really love. But your Dad is blinded by the religion, his ignorance, and the influence of your bossy Mother. Honey I have felt sorry for that man ever since I met your folks 34 years ago. He doesn't have a shread of back bone, your Mom verbally has beaten it out of him. Remember he is chosing the religion over his love for you. Sometimes parents are just not worthy of the great children they have and such is your situation. Your better than they ever dreamed of.
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  Crumpet

  I've never been a dub, but if I would have been there, I would go over to your folks, and would say "I not a JW, and I just can't believe that parents would reject their child .... is this true ... is this what JWs really believe, because if it is, I'm never going to give them the time of day when they're in my neighborhood. I only want to talk to people who share the true Gospel of Christ, which is LOVE and not rejection".

  I think non-JWs who are in-the-know need to stand up for their ex-JW friends and let the world know, publicly and loudly the TRUE nature of this pseudo-religion.

  I just wanted to add that this is just a lovely thought from Double Edge - it would make a difference if more Non-Jws started saying things back at the doors along these lines to witnesses. My school friend's mother does this to this day - still appalled that my parents threw me out effectively at 16 years old without because I didn;t want to be part of their religion.

  It sounds like you have a cool group of friends Unique 1 as well as a strong reasonable mind of your own. And congrats on getting it annulled - can I ask on what grounds you had it annulled. I rather wish I had pursued that route - I did try once although I didn;t have a word for it.
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  Crumpet

  misposted!