Welcome confuused!
Follow you heart and instinct, you know what they are telling you is wrong.
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need Help! not sure what to do.
by confuuused 27 Replies latest jw experiences
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Nowman
I advise you not to study with JWs because this org is a cult. I was raised as a JW and I left when I was 18. I was disfellowshipped. I have not seen or spoken to my dad since October of 1992 and my mom, well from 1992 to 2000, we did not speak or see each other. I was an only child. Mom and I finally reunited after 8 years after she was disfellowshipped also. The religion tears familes apart.
If you have doubts, go with your instinct!!
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confuuused
Wow, all you are just wonderful. It was great to hear from so many of you.
Thank you all so much for your help. I now know what I have to do,It's not going back to
jw's. I for those who were wondering why I started studying with the jw's, it started at my
mothers place. I was already studying the Bible on my own but my mom was having Bible
study at her place. I decided to join her. I thought that if I studied more with someone I would
feel closer to God. Well my mother started to feel the same as I having questions and not
getting answers.neeless to say she got out and I was having a hard time letting go. I guess that
to me it was a life line to God, but I do see and understand that I don't need someone telling
me how to live and what to think to be closer to God. I think that I will start back to my old
Church this Sunday. (THEY ALMOST HAD ME!!!!) I'm so glad that I found this site and had
so much help from all of you. Don't get me wrong I do feel some relief knowing that I was not
tuaght the wrong way,but I still feel guilty for leaving and I'm sure that will take some time to
get over. In the mean time I will pray for guidance from the Almighty One.
God Bless all of you!!!
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MadamDefiance
I agree with jgnat. Do not give in to the JW doctrine hype. Not having a relationship with your children will haunt you and them. I am not a JW anymore, but my mother continues to be. Let me tell you, even though I do not agree with my mom's ways as a JW. She is my mother and I sometimes catch myself wishing she would still accept me. And somtimes I wonder if she has any of her own reasoning mind left to think of me or remember me as her baby she use to carry in her arms....................................................................................................................
It is painful once you are in it and you realize you have created an emotional death with your children and family.
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Cognitive_Dissident
Welcome to the board Confuuused! As many have already said, don't let the guilt influence your decisions. Jehovah's Witnesses are a cult, pure and simple. Guilt and fear are two of the powerful tools they use.
Here is some interesting reading on what makes a cult. It's taken from the following website:
www.religio.de/cudef.html
CULT - Any group which has a pyramid type authoritarian leadership structure with all teaching and guidance coming from the person/persons at the top. The group will claim to be the only way to God; Nirvana; Paradise; Ultimate Reality; Full Potential, Way to Happiness etc, and will use thought reform or mind control techniques to gain control and keep their members. This definition covers cults within all majopr world religions, along with those cults which have no OBVIOUS religious base such as commercial, educational and psychological cults. Others may define these a little differently, but this is the simplest to work from. THE 'ORTHODOX BIBLE-BASED CULT'
A group is called a cult because of their behaviour - not their doctrines. Doctrine is an issue in the area of Apologetics and Heresy. Most religious cults do teach what the Christian church would declare to be heresy but some do not. Some cults teach the basics of the Christian faith but have behavioural patterns that are abusive, controlling and cultic.
This occurs in both Non-Charismatic and Charismatic churches. These groups teach the central doctrines of the Christian faith and then add the extra authority of leadership or someone's particular writings. They centre around the interpretations of the leadership and submissive and unquestioning acceptance of these is essential to be a member of good standing. This acceptance includes what we consider non-essential doctrines e.i. not salvation issues (such as the Person and Work of Christ.) The key is that they will be using mind control or undue influence on their members.
An excellent book on this subject is "Churches that Abuse" by Dr Ronald Enroth.
Using these guidelines of definition, Bible-based, Psychological, Educational and Commercial aberrations can easily be identified.
OTHER IDENTIFICATION MARKS
(a) The group will have an ELITIST view of itself in relation to others, and a UNIQUE CAUSE. e.i. THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES RIGHT - everyone else is wrong. THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES DOING GOD'S WILL - everyone else is in apostasy.
(b) They will promote their cause actively, and in doing so, abuse God-given personal rights and freedoms. This abuse can be THEOLOGICAL, SPIRITUAL, SOCIAL & PSYCHOLOGICAL.
HOW THEY DO THIS
1. Their leader/s may claim a special, exclusive ministry, revelation or position of authority given by God.
2. They believe they are the only true church and take a critical stance regarding the Christian church while at the same time praising and exalting their own group, leader/s and work.
3. They use intimidation or psychological manipulation to keep members loyal to their ranks. This could be in the form of threats of dire calamity sent by God if they leave; certain death at Armageddon; being shunned by their family and friends etc. This is a vital part of the mind control process.
4. Members will be expected to give substantial financial support to the group. This could be compulsory tithing (which is checked); signing over all their property on entering the group; coercive methods of instilling guilt on those who have not contributed; selling magazines, flowers or other goods for the group as part of their "ministry".
5. At the same time bible-based cults may ridicule churches that take up free-will offerings by passing collection plates and/or sell literature and tapes. They usually brag that they don't do this. This gives outsiders the intimation that they are not interested in money.
6. There will be great emphasis on loyalty to the group and its teachings. The lives of members will be totally absorbed into the group's activities. They will have little or no time to think for themselves because of physical and emotional exhaustion. This is also a vital part of the mind control process.
7. There will be total control over almost all aspects of the private lives of members. This control can be direct through communal living, or constant and repetitious teaching on "how to be a true Christian" or "being obedient to leadership". Members will look to their leaders for guidance in everything they do.
8. Bible-based cults may proclaim they have no clergy/laity distinction and no paid ministry class - that they are all equal.
9. Any dissent or questioning of the group's teachings is discouraged. Criticism in any form is seen as rebellion. There will be an emphasis on authority, unquestioning obedience and submission. This is vigilantly maintained.
10. Members are required to demonstrate their loyalty to the group in some way. This could be in the form of "dobbing" on fellow members (including family) under the guise of looking out for "spiritual welfare".
They may be required to deliberately lie (heavenly deception/theocratic strategy) or give up their lives by refusing some form of medical treatment.
11. Attempts to leave or reveal embarrassing facts about the group may be met with threats. Some may have taken oaths of loyalty that involve their lives or have signed a "covenant" and feel threatened by this.
Refugees of the group are usually faced with confrontations by other members with coercion to get them to return to the group.
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jw
They say if I become jw then I would
have to stay away from my family because they are not of the "JW's world".
DON"T DO IT> GODS SAYS FAMILY FIRST.
I asked about my
kids (ages 16 & 17) because they now live with their father. I was told because they do not live
in the same house as I do the same would apply to them. Am I wrong in thinking that this is
just not right.
DO NOT LISTEN TO HUMANS LISTEN TO WHAT THE SCRIPTURES SAY ON THE MATTER.
That because someone does not have the same beliefs as I do that they should
be shunned?
JESUS WALKED AMONG EVIL DOERS and had dinner with them, he just did not socialize with them . And he only did because they had a listening ear to GODS word. AND JESUS SHUNNED NO ONE.
I was raised to love all no matter their religion or what they have done.
YES, HATE THE DEED NOT THE PERSON.
That you should help others come to Christ not avoid them because they are not of your world.
WHAT they meant was not to hang out with evil doers because you will become like them. But that does not mean to ignore or shunn them. How else are they to become believers?
Please help was I taught wrong or am I thinking the right way,that jw's teachings of shunning people
is wrong. It is wrong.
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LDH
Hello.
Listen to your heart. Your heart tells you it is not right to shun your children or others.
The JW are a religion that teach you to suppress the real feelings in your heart. They will read scriptures out of context such as "The heart is treacherous, who can know it." They will teach you to make decisions based on THEIR moral code rather than listen to your heart.
I'm not religious, but didn't Jesus give Christians the two commands they should follow? Weren't both based on love? Was either one based on shunning?
Lisa
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greendawn
You got it right they are a destructive cult that will cause you a lot of problems and aggravation if you join them, they have a terrible history in this respect with many of their members or ex members, and the wise thing to do is to keep away from them.
So don't let them continue to influence you, you don't need their so called help to learn about God.