Anger!!!!

FlyingHighNow

Yesterday, when I was driving through Holland, Michigan, I was a little lost looking for the Human Resources office. I was heading down a busy divided four lane street unfamiliar, when I looked up and there it was, a Kingdom Hall in all it's radiant three day quick-build glory. And for the first time, rather than just the usual cringe, I felt ANGRY!

Since my only, beloved sister, her family and my baby brother (45 years old, but still my baby brother) and his wife have decided to shun me, so completely that even if one of them is eaten up with cancer, dying or dead, they find me so disgusting that they will not contact me. The reality of the control of the WTBTS has sunk in more than it ever did. And I am finally angry about it.

I have gone through these emotions over the past few years, since becoming inactive (but still mostly believing) until now. Specifically these are the emotions I have felt, in order chronologically, when passing a Kingdom Hall.

Sadly sentimental "Ohhh, there's a Kingdom Hall *Sigh*"
Yikes! There's a Kingdom Hall " "If I went in there and they knew all about me, they'd back away and there'd be a 30 foot circumfrence circle between me and the frightened congregants"
"Oh God, not another one."
Lady-like me: flipping them off.
Anger!!!!

Now I just want signs posted outside each one that say, "Warning: these people may seem harmless, but they break up families!!!" Then give a web-site address and/or phone number.

I just thought I'd share my new-found anger. I read Crisis of Conscience in 2001 and that's when I knew 100% the WTBTS were dangerous liars. I had been inactive since 1991 or 1992.

Feel free to rant about your anger or come up with signs to post near Kingdom Halls. Please post. I need fellow feeling.

kid-A

How about replacing the little scripture billboard inside the hall?

Lo-ru-hamah

I know what you mean. I see red every time I pass a Kingdom Hall. And I know that this is bad but I throw trash in their yard whenever I can. Though, that is probably aggression that is more harmful to me and my family.

Sorry you have been so ill treated by your family: (

Loruhamah

anewme

Anger is definitely one of the common feelings expressed towards the society by those who left it.

However it may be that you will continue to modify your intense feelings as you grow further and further away from its infuence.

I have not been able to maintain alot of anger towards that org.
I sometimes think it would be healthy for me to do so. I could turn fully away from my family still in and put all my energies and attention on my new life and forget forever the past.

But I feel that soon, one of these days coming up, I will announce my cure complete and say thankyou and goodbye to all here.

Anewme

anewme

Loruhamah!!!! That is sooooo bad!!! You throw trash on the Kingdom Hall property whenever you can????

That is soooooo bad (but sooooo funny!)

juni

For a VERY long time I cringed when I saw a man wearing a suit.

And yes I get a burn in the pit of my stomach when I see a Kingdom Hall.

Juni

stillajwexelder

I am told that anger is part of the healing process

love2Bworldly

I didn't feel anger toward them until I came to this website one year ago this month, and learned about Silent Lambs and all the people that have been hurt and swept under the carpet.

Now I feel an intense urge to throw eggs or cuss out the window when I drive by Kingdumb Hells.

Madame Quixote

There are stages of grief, as I'm sure you've heard: denial (& sometimes bargaining), anger, grief, acceptance.

It's hard to get to the last one - acceptance, esp. since we're not truly grieving a death, (but it always feels that way, esp. in the early stages), and because there is always a small flicker of hope that the loved ones stuck in the cult will come out.

It's like coping with loved ones being in a coma. You accept it one day; but then, one day, you feel stark, raving mad over something that reminds you that your loved one is somehow choosing to stay in their little cult-induced coma.

You're perfectly normal; just don't let the anger eat you up. You seem to be active with your life - doing things outside of just being angry, trying to be part of the solution, rather than just ranting. Your political and social activism can be both helpful and educational, although it's easy to get stuck in the 'i'm right & you're wrong' jw mode. I think you're on the road to recovery, on the right track, though.

BTW, I fantasize about covering up all the local KH signs with bedsheets advertising the silentlambs website, with warnings about how the KHs are havens for child molesters. I will probably actually do it someday. At least doing that isn't vandalism or destroying personal property. It might violate some code or something, but hell, who cares?! As long as the JWs can't make any money for me doing it, I'd be satisfied.

I think it's hilarious that someone throws their trash on the KH lawns. I think I'd like to start doing that, too, although I am totally against littering and really fanatical about it! I have a car full of garbage sometimes . . . But, hmmm!

delilah

FHN....anger is part of the healing process. I went through it last year, when I first came here, to JWD. Sometimes topics will arise, and I feel that anger swell up inside me all over again. ( Like when I read the CoC book a month ago). It soon subsides, and I can go on. I can't say that I will ever forgive the WTBTS for what it has done to hundreds of thousands of us. I'd like to think that I could be the better one for doing so, though. What they have done is the unforgivable sin, in my mind.

Let your anger flow, Flying High.....

Anger!!!!

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