Do you REALLY want to know? (page 2)

Finally-Free

I always check the mileage before buying a used car. Why should people be any different?

W

mrsjones5

I didn't really need to know but my mate told me anyway, I didn't even ask. Didn't affect the way I felt about him, still doesn't

Josie.

delilah

I would be more concerned about seeing a recent blood test and know they are desease free

Yeah, I'd be a little concerned about this too, simply because I've been very careful, and would not want to jeapordize my health.

LMAO Elsewhere...how funny.

I think it just depends on what I think is motivating the question. I have been asked the question and answered and in turn, I have asked the question and have been unhappy with the answer. One of the questions I was asked was could I name all my sexual partners, including all their first and last names.

Satanus

I like to get a general idea. Exclusivity is more important to me.

S

Ms. Whip

No, it's not really important for me to know how many sexual partners someone has had before we dated. But, for a committed relationship...honesty is important. For me to open up and trust someone completely....they would have to feel they could trust me completely. If they felt they had to hide that part of themselves from me, I don't think I could handle that. I guess it comes partly from feeling betrayed by the witnesses. I just don't want anything hidden. Lay all your cards on the table and let me decide whether or not I want to take the hand. You can hide the details or how they made you feel. But, be straight & open with me. I can take it...plus, I'll feel more at ease to do the same.

collegegirl21

I'm not sure if I would ask. I would rather have them get tested for other things since I learned the statistics of people carrying STD's in the United States, so I think I would rather be more safe than sorry.

free2beme

If we care about how many, then why do we continue having sex with people before we commit to a marriage? Are we not adding to our own, this might be more then you can handle, list? It is modern society that people have a lot of partners in their closet.

Madame Quixote

Having a (physically, mentally, emotionally) healthy partner is more important than his experience; and knowing that I can trust him to respect himself enough to protect us both from unwanted consequences by using protection is a priority, not his (or my) past "conquests" or disasters.

We can teach each other what we like & don't like. Asking about the number of previous partners is an invasive question; asking it can lead to unfortunate consequences for a new relationship, where most of us may already feel a bit insecure.

Everybody has a past and everyone has something they might not want to share, esp. in the beginning of any relationship, platonic or otherwise.

Where there is enough safety and trust, people can elect to discuss what is appropriate in that regard. I don't think the question needs to be asked of or by healthy, secure, stable people; however, there's nothing unnatural or unhealthy about being a bit curious, and certainly if you expect to have a monogamous relationship with someone who has a history of philandering, you might want to think twice about it and ask yourself if you've chosen the most compatible person to "settle down" with.

But just because a person has such a history, it doesn't mean they're incapable of settling down; or that that isn't what they were looking for all along. You just have to have trust and faith in your partner and be lucky and smart enough to settle on someone whose behaviour and attitudes about sex are compatible with yours. And that really does involve a lot of luck and some smarts.

I personally have not been that smart or lucky yet, but I know people who are.

G Money

Do you really want to marry the whore of Babylon? I guess disease free is a good start but I'd be leary of a lady who had a history of not saying no.

Do you REALLY want to know?