hi desi - some good questions there
Does anyone else find themselves embarrassed about their JW past?
I used to be very embarrassed. It was similar to the feeling when I told people I had been sexually abused as a child. Shame, guilt and embarrassed. A part of that was also the feelings about how and why I left - more abuse and being DFed. For a while I used to tell people I was a minister's wife (few understand the elder thing).
I find that when people that know what I used to be ask me about it I am completely embarrassed by how foolish their beliefs sound especially things like the blood issue. I can't stand when someone will say "why did you believe such and such....?"
I start those answers with a quick "I can't believe that I believed those things either!". It takes the embarrassment away and uses a bit of humor to release some of the tension I felt.
What do you answer to that, "because I was an idiot?" or "because I was brainwashed?"
I explain to them the various ways the WTS controls people. Most people have experienced some kind of manipulation in life. I find that spot and help them understand it.
To me the fact that I once believed things like that makes me seem less intelligent now. Does anyone else feel that way?
There is nothing wrong with admitting that you were wrong or manipulated. The alternative is that you stayed there and still beleive the crap. For the most part, we live in a society of recovery programs. It is acceptable now to say "I was an alcoholic" or "I was a cult member" There is actually more pride in getting out than in staying in.
Be proud that you have learned and are now free. - There is no shame whatsoever in that.
