by Ms. Whip 45 Replies latest jw friends
In the collective you're being told and shown an unrealistic view of what marriage is.
I agree completely. That alone is very damaging.
When there are problems- "Go read your lies secrets to family happiness book." Sorry, but that doesn't cut it.
Ms.Whip--I got your point, and must say that you are very funny!
I understand too! When I was about 17, there was a tall, skinny, pimply kid of 19 who rode a bicycle to the Hall. He was always staring at me and maneuvering to get in our car group for service. My parents thought I should be paying attention to him, at least considering him for a suitor. What did we possibly have in commom, but that we were Dubs, and went to the same Hall. He eventually went off to Bethel but didn't stay long. He married a sister and they had five kids. She was a nurse and supported them all.
Wow, that coulda been me!
but you have to leave that crap behind. Real love and trust and honesty and inner beauty was something I found outside the organisation.
Ballistic, I feel that I did. And I have moved on, it's just that topics like this brings it all back to me. Which I don't mind...I personally feel that I'm stronger as a person now that I've faced it and talked about it. I realized that it was all lies.Now I can move on...and live.
I feel for those that gave TEN plus years of their life to a lie.
jojochan.
I was never married while I was a member, but I still remember the desperation. Now that you mention it I did see
a few Great Dane -Tea Cup Poodle crosses.
Since I'm male and was about 24 at the time I got a lot of attention and that may be why I stuck around as long as
I did.
They run to the elders for answers and what do they get?....xeroxed copies of a W.T article from the early 90's on having a successful marraige.
LOL that's really sad.
I never got screwed in the marriage department because I never got married and believe me I had a lot of girls chasing me. I just couldn't swallow getting married and kids by my mid 20s. UG Not to mention all the sad marriages around pretty much everywhere I looked. I did get the comments about being 'older' and not married. I never told them about the married ones making comments about wishing they were like me and still single...
I recall a young couple who had nothing in common except they were pioneers. They married to have a pioneer partner. They never looked happy, they wern't matched correctly. It had nothing to do with attractiveness. Both were attractive people. Left to their own will, they would never have gotten together. They have children now, but you can see they have never been actually happy. Sexual incompatibility.
many years ago I recall a pioneer couple who moved into the cong. He was in his 20's and she in her 60's. They married of course execting the end to come and age would not matter. It has been a long time but I believe she died and he remarried very quickly a suitable bride and were most welcomed by the cong. They (the cong) even felt their marriage was grotesque. I wonder if they would have felt that way if the man had been 60 and woman 20?
Oh and if some believe jws do not have social class divisions, well, some years ago a 60ish country brother married a 60ish city sis, whose family was all jws and all well off. I heard a sis remark "it is such a shame sisters have to marry beneath them" .There was nothing wrong with that brother, I knew him. He was a likeable wonderful person who lived in the country but was not in any form or fashion a "redneck"( I hate even using that b/c it is as much a racial slur as any other) Social class divisions are alive and well among jws despite what they say .
