Do you feel hypocritical?

by rekless 15 Replies latest jw friends

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  Wasanelder Once

  One day I said to my Father, "I'm not going anymore. It's bullshit and I'm not going to go. You watch, no one will even call to see what's up. I stopped that day and its been nearly two years since. No one asks, no one calls, no one cares. Thats what I figured. I save a ton of gas and aggravation from having to hurry and get ready to go be berated for not being like the elders, who of course are a farce.

  The last few months I attended, I only answered when my answer would be accurate and non Society oriented, Jesus' ransom etc. and not placements. In time I figured it was a waste of breath so I came to the conclusion I did.

  Dont miss them a bit. Only miss the level of activity in helping others. Don't trust anyone now and so I'm not motivated to sign up with anyone else. I just read, write and enjoy each day.

  Not feeling hypocritcal since I left the hypocritical headquarters in our city, THe Kingdom Hell.

  W.Once
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  freedomlover

  there was a time I felt like a hypocrite. I'm not good at being deceptive. you might even say I'm honest to a fault.....
  
  I couldn't sing the songs, comment, or go out in service and tell people I had cornered the market on salvation.
  
  Now - I don't feel hypocritical or guilty over anything. it's the best feeling in the world.
  
  bring on the condescending stares and unapproving head shakes.....
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  Midget-Sasquatch

  I'm in a foul mood tonight so I'll probably vent more than I usually do. Yes, I feel hypocritical. But not only because I'm still attending meetings and conventions ( Its the only way so far for me to keep the scintilla of a relationship I have with my father, and I don't want to hurt my mom more than I already have, being a total loser and embarassment even to her non jw family). I've also always kept silent about the dysfunction of our family and my father's temperamental outbursts. This cult has done nothing but exacerbate our problems. I'm a massive hypocrite because I've always kept up the appearance of a happy dub family. I've mastered the skill of putting on a fake smile at the hall only minutes after a major blowup with my father. He was a good example in that respect.
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  nicolaou

  Midget, you are not a massive hypocrite. You're doing what you feel you have to for the sake of the people you love, you're making a sacrifice. If our families were more tolerant and less judgemental none of us would have to behave like this.

  All the best mate
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  free2beme

  I think life is just one phase of hyprocritical life style, fading into another. Basically, it's the human thing to be some level of a hypocrite at any given time.
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  Midget-Sasquatch

  nicolau

  Thanks for the kind word. I really admire those who da'ed despite all the loss of family and friends, and I'm hard on myself because I haven't shown that degree of integrity and honesty. But I guess feeling bad about my faking means I'm not so far gone. One day nicolau I'll let them all know what I think, but like you made me realize, the current Borg system isn't conducive to it. I'll just bide my time.

  Thanks again.