Should Jehovah's Witnesses Be Allowed to Adopt Children?

by TMS 49 Replies latest jw friends

  • TMS
    TMS

    So many thoughtful, well-reasoned comments above.

    Actually, I've been assessing my/our own performance as a parent/parents lately. In 1995 our neighbor of over twenty years, Mrs. Brown, paid us the finest complement we've ever received: "You two are the best parents I've ever seen. It was a pleasure to watch the way you dealt with your son these past twenty years."

    What Mrs. Brown saw over two decades was a family throwing the football, going to "church" frequently, getting ready for weekend trips and family vacations. She knew our little son received some recognition in grade school and probably felt the academic side was well cared for. Good grooming, dress and manners may have contributed to her overall impression.

    What our neighbor from across the street didn't see was the reality of what has been stated in this thread. If good parenting is preparing children to function well and productively on their own, Jehovah's Witnesses don't do very well. The stunted social skills, the educational and cultural deprivations and the tunnel-visioned religionism are well-documented. Many, like us, do the very best they can within the framework of their belief system. But the concept that JW's are "better mothers and fathers, better children, better employees and employers, etc." is a myth.

    I came to the conclusion that Jehovah's Witnesses, in general, do not make good parents.

    Thus, the question posed in this thread.

    tms

  • tfsm
    tfsm

    No.

  • Masterji
    Masterji

    TMS said: "I came to the conclusion that Jehovah's Witnesses, in general, do not make good parents."

    I fail to agree.

    M

  • TMS
    TMS

    "TMS said: "I came to the conclusion that Jehovah's Witnesses, in general, do not make good parents."

    I fail to agree.

    M"

    Masterji,

    Care to elaborate? How would you define the role of parents? Evidently, you feel that Jehovah's Witnesses, in general, make good parents.

    tms

  • Stealth453
    Stealth453

    An emphatic.....

    NO

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    TMS -

    I want to thank you for such a thought provoking thread. I have been riveted to this thread since inception.

    As an adoptive parent it opened issues to chew on for some time to come. Wifey and I are filling the role of parents again - this time as we raise our 3 grandchildren. This time round we are not JW's. We do celebrate birthdays and holidays now. We would not refuse blood transfusions if needed to save a life. We encourage social relationships that as Jw's we discouraged. But our basic parenting views remain. They were largely shaped by 40 years of indoctrination in the witness religion of course, but tempered by our own personalities and world views too.

    I staunchly hold to my position regarding civil rights and equality under law, including for Jw's. The system in place for most of the United States seems to be focused on the 'best interest of the child', as it should be. In that I would not find any disagreement. One poster suggested that there has been a divergence of thought here from the actual posed question. ' Should Jehovah's Witnesses Be Allowed to Adopt Children?', to answers that seem to answer the question; 'Is it a good idea for Jehovah's Witnesses to adopt children'?

    In answer to the second question, I would mostly agree with the majority of posters here. No. Primarily due to the stunted emotional and social environment that they are immersed in. As well as the potential dangers to the child in the area of blood transfusions.

    Thanx again for this thread.

    Jeff

  • ex-perfectdaughter
    ex-perfectdaughter

    I think they should be able to adopt but, I think they should make being a JW opitional for the children. I think if the kid wants to go to the KH take him, but if he doesn't she should be forced to. Give the kid a home not a religion.

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    we have some JW friends who adopted six children over the years..............they are in a registry to adopt "unadoptable" kids, such as those born to drug addicts, born with birth defects as well as from people specifying JW parents. They got a brother and sister who were being raised by a JW grandmother who had terminal cancer.

    They are great people, liberal JW's, and the kids all turned out great. One had cerebral palsy and was supposedly very very mentally retarded (I know that's not the right term) but turned out to be a genius and is doing very well. All are grown up now and only one is still a JW. Yay!

    After reading this thread, I need to add this comment: We raised all four of our kids as JW's, and only learned the real truth after all were grown. They have all left the JW's now, and all are wonderful people with good marriages, wonderful children and successful lives. I think we were awesome parents. Being a JW isn't a factor, at least for us. On the other hand, I know of non-JW's that should never have been allowed to reproduce.

  • TMS
    TMS

    Mulan,

    What I would give now to have been one of those liberal, realistic, non-fanatical JW's I now read about on this forum. I grew up actually proud of my lack of academic achievement, financial success and material possessions.

    The only thing we passed on to our now mid-thirties son is that nothing mattered while in this system except "serving Jehovah."

    The JW's you describe who successfully raised adopted children I respect greatly. That does not change my view that JW's in general, because of the belief system in place and the Pharisaical rules they live by are generally not good candidates for adoption.

    tms

  • Wordly Andre
    Wordly Andre
    No but JW children should have the option to adopt new parents that won;t submit them to brainwashing and guilt-tripping and ostracism from society.

    I totally agree with Crumpy,

    in fact if I was a kid I would totally rather get adopted by interracial, lesbian, drug addicted, UFO surviving, Trailer park living, wiccan, biker, hippies, than JW's

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