Questions....

by schne_belly 26 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Warlock

  First of all, don't become enraged. I don't think it's about giving anyone "power".It's about controlling your emotions. Getting angry gives the negativity of the experience, "power". The angrier you get, the more "power" you give TO THE EXPERIENCE.

  Second of all, is this really something that we have to "win"? I think that this is a mistake that many make. This is not "do or die", "win or lose". This is about getting on with OUR lives as best we can. I don't think "the truth" will ever completely leave our minds, so there is no use struggling.

  When a situation reminds us of our experience(s) in "the truth", just acknowledge it, don't fight it, and accept that it was once, and may still be, part of your life.

  When you deal with relatives or friends in "the truth" how do you expect them to behave towards you? Like a Catholic? If you expect anything other than them behaving like a Jehovah's Witness, then you WILL be VERY frustrated, indeed. Hope this made sense, and I hope it helps.

  Warlock(not as dumb as I look)
• 

  schne_belly

  Are you saying you should be able to pretend you don't love those you love simply because they are retarded in their love by organizational dogma? I don't see how pretending we don't love people is strength. I'd say it takes more strength to acknowledge and endure the pain their choice causes us than it does to pretend the pain isn't there.

  AuldSoul: Hummm good question!

  I guess I feel allowing them hurt me again and again, IS a weakness. Feeling pain, is only human. Does that make any sense?
• 

  Bryan

  And I'll tell you SB, it took me 5 years to that little JW demon out of the back of my head. It's not easy. Be strong, be confident and education is the key.

  Best,

  Bryan
• 

  AuldSoul

  schne-belly,

  I understand. But I have decided that feeling is not a weakness, depending on what it motivates me to do. And my reaction to my feelings is my choice, even if the feelings aren't. That's why I'm still alive. I don't think that is weakness, but that is just my opinion.

  Respectfully,
  AuldSoul
• 

  schne_belly

  I don't think "the truth" will ever completely leave our minds, so there is no use struggling.

  Warlock: unfortunatly, you are probably right. ( SIGH)

  It's obvious since we see some who have left years and years ago, some who've only studied, or just have relatives "in" go through these struggles.
• 

  schne_belly

  depending on what it motivates me to do

  AuldSoul: THAT is key.... You got it right on the head, my friend! ( by the way I always enjoy your comments)

  I understand what you mean too.... I guess in THIS situation I feel I should be stronger, because when I allow "them" to get to me, I feel like doing mean horrible things, and that is out of character for me! LOL!

  In other aspects of life, it's different and I can control myself more and make the best of it or turn the situation into something good!
• 

  AuldSoul

  I feel like doing mean horrible things, and that is out of character for me!

  Imagining mean and horrible things is not weakness, acting on them when doing so would be contrary to personal integrity is weakness. How do you measure up on that score? Imagining unbidden horrible things that you choose not to act on...is strength. Which is why I'm still alive.

  Respectfully,
  AuldSoul
• 

  schne_belly

  Imagining unbidden horrible things that you choose not to act on...is strength.

  I have no argument there! Thanks for putting a positive spin on it!
• 

  Nowman

  I have an example and to me it applies to this thread. Last year I ran into a friend of mine who I had not seen in 15 years, we were best friends while in the org...I then had to move to another hall...anyway when I ran into her....

  I was with some of my girlfriends, they went off so I could catch up with my friend from long ago....In conversation, I told her about my life, blah blah. Later in the conversation...she had told me she had just gotten out of prision, asked me if I like to party and what do I do? Meaning, she wanted to know if I did coke, because that was her drug of choice, I was like never tried, the girls and I will go out, we'll drink, but we don't do drugs, hell most of us have children...I was surprised that she still wanted to live this lifestyle...and by the way, I later found out she was with her sugar daddy.

  My point is when we started talking about the JW thing, she admitted she wanted to go back eventually, when I told her about Silent Lambs, and JWD, she had the gall to get self righteuous and say something like, "Nikki, I can't believe you look at those apostate sites, have you become an apostate"?...I could tell by her tone she was absolutely offended. I then realized this would be the last time I would speak to her again because I had no plans of returning to the cult. This girl was so brainwashed still after all these years and even had the nerve to try to lecture me about my life and not being a JW???? Yet, I was not offended that she had been in prision, still wanted to pursue her drugs, and continue to live that life, I just felt sorry for her, and was going to try to help her but she was going to turn on me because I was never going to be a JW again. Its absolutely insane and sick.

  Nikki
• 

  AuldSoul

  Nikki: Its absolutely insane and sick.

  Truer words were never wrote.