Does anyone really have a chaperone when out with the opposite sex?

by WingCommander 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • WingCommander
    WingCommander

    Somehow, I seriously doubt it. It was spoken about when I was growing up that that was supposed to be the "loving arrangement", but I never heard, saw, or did it myself, nor did anyone else. Since I wasn't allowed out of the house, much less date until I was 16, it wasn't really an issue for me anyway. But when my overbearing parents finally did realize that I was going to graduate high school and that I was working part-time and striving for my current profession, they finally decided I could do what I wanted, as long as I was back before midnight. Guess I'd turn into a freakin pumpkin or something after midnight...sheesh. Anyway, I dated worldly girls, stayed out after working, etc my junior and senior years of high school. Those 2 years almost made up for the previous 14 that I wasn't allowed to do anything.....almost. Guess what? I still managed to graduate in the top 10% of my class! Gee, did I mention the Valedictorian was a JW, and that his pompous jerk JW mother was pushing him into college? So much for pioneering for the rest of your life, huh?

    Anyway, I think the entire chaperone thing is overbearing and sooo middle-ages. Who makes this stupid shit up? Like people have time to go chaperoning all of the dating youth in the congregation on top of their normal lifes activities and daily WT meeting schedule and studying. What a complete load of crap! Makes me wonder what else when in one ear and out the other!

    Thoughs? Opinions? Horror stories?

    Regards,

    Wing Commander

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    I've been a chaperone, for a young couple who made it quite obvious they didn't want me there, it was their parents idea for me to be there. It's not something I ever wanted to do again.

  • katiekitten
    katiekitten

    I know quite a few couples who were made to have chaperones all the time by their parents - it was usually pissed off younger siblings that were made to do it.

    I was made to have my fiances younger brother come out with us some of the time but not all of the time (not sure how that was supposed to work) but it was pretty gruesome for all 3 of us - him because he was clearly not wanted and us because he clearly did not want to be with us watching us snog.

    This was until we got married at 20.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Some JWs would drive separately to a restaurant and no chaperone was needed.

    Some JWs would drive separately to a mall, ice skating rink, etc., sporting event, concert and no chaperone was needed.

    Reason: they were in a public place.

  • dirtyface1
    dirtyface1

    I had a chaperone that just wouldn't leave us alone. We couldn't talk with each other without her making a comment. So, I found it easier to just hang with the brothers . We hung out alone and more without any problems. .

  • lowden
    lowden

    I'd like to know where chaperoning actually originated. It's not mentioned or even intimated in the bible.....is it?

    Let's face it....if yer gonna shag, yer gonna shag. No chaperone is going to stop two lust driven humans from playing 'hide the sausage' if they really want to.

    Lowden

  • restrangled
    restrangled

    I can see from your post you were male, which automatically gave you a little more lee-way.

    You were dating at age 16? Unheard of where I came from. In fact I was told at age 13, I would not be dating until age 18, and my brothers would be in any back seats as far as my elder father was concerned. (This set in motion something the WBTS, parents, and elders could never control)

    As most of you know, raised as a JW teenager we, (not all) learned to be manipulators, double life leaders and liars, just to survive.

    You bet there were chaparones, my little brothers were taken everywhere. The ironic part of this story is that any where they tagged along I wouldn't have been caught dead being attracted to anyone in the party!

    I can remember being at a party without my brothers, and finally met a great guy. (my now husband!) An elder who was attending (straight out of Bethel and maybe 25 years old) insisted he was going to drive me home. I told him No I already had a ride with this fellow. I believe he followed us all the way home!

    Anyone in the hall who was dating had to do so in groups and were highly critisized and/or counseled if ever alone.

    This was the entire 70's

    r.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    Just make sure your chaparones are hot and turn it into a group grope.

    W

  • Gregor
    Gregor

    These days, I think chaperones are responsible for making sure condoms are used.

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    Oh YES! The practice was insisted on in this congregation! It got to be to the ridiculous extremes----like walking three houses away to the house that our bookstudy was held in.....my daughters needed chaperones if and when I didn't get to the meeting! None of my boys ever dated anyone while they were still in the KH.

    We borrowed an idea from one of the sis' who had seven kids.....that when the bro would come to visit and they wanted some verbal privacy, they would sit out at the picnic table in plain view of the entire family inside the house! They got to talk a bit more freely than if they had the relatives breathing down their necks for the evening.

    This was back in the 70-80's and I have no idea if this is still done today!

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