A pioneer "sister" sent me this one.

by watson 27 Replies latest jw friends

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  daniel-p

  .) 'I'M TOO BUSY'
  
  You might say:
  
  "No you're not. You were probably watching TV or kicking back right?
  
  Don't lie to me. Do you know who the father of the lie is? It's Satan!
  
  Here, let me read to you John 8:44. Is he your daddy? I think so!"

  Answer: Do you know who the father of 6.5 million cult members with heads up their asses is? That's right, you know it... 12 old crackpots in Brooklyn. When I said I was too busy I meant it. I am too busy to breathe air, exhaling it, and speaking to the mist of matter before my eyes which will surely vanish once it ceases to do enough for those 12 old crackpots in Brooklyn. I'd rather have the great Satanus as my "daddy" than that impotent elder-janitor you call your husband.
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  daniel-p

  heh, that was fun.
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  jeanniebeanz

  lmao@daniel-p
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  Gill

  This pioneer sister was obviously looking for a knuckle sandwich, or a bunch of fives!
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  jaguarbass

  Excellent. I will have to keep that.
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  BrendaCloutier

  I'm thinking of printing that out and posting it by the front door, and give it back to any witlesses that happen to stop by! Too funny! I can just see their faces go pale and eyes staring out as if I were DEMUNIZED!

  BOO!
• 

  GentlyFeral

  Well, we paganistic folks will never get a chance to use this on a jaydub at the door, 'cause they're too mealy-mouthed to actually say that sh!t. But it doesn't hurt to be prepared, does it?

  Blood turn black and flesh turn blue: I will curse you if you force as you have forced me to. By the left hand and the unclean food, I'll curse your eyes, I'll curse your lies, I'll call down a plague of flies! Blood go black and flesh go blue; evil from me and back to you; my soul clean and yours on fire: you fuck with crossed a witch; you get burned now burn, you liar!

  Gently (?) Feral
• 

  katiekitten

  Wow what a great curse!

  Its way better than mine (f00k off you mentalist)
• 

  Arthur

  And think about all of the emotional abuse we used to take from the "higher ups" who constantly use guilt to manipulate the minions. "You need to put in more hours, you need to get meeting attendance up, you need to get more Bible studies, you need to do more . . . more . . . . more." How did many of us Witnesses let out our frustration and anger? We certainly couldn't let it out on the beloved and sacred "faithful slave". We capped on the Catholics, Mormons, and Born Agains. What' that old saying about bullies? Kids who bully others on the playground are usually victims of bullying at home. Whoever wrote that caustic and infantile diatribe (disguised as JW humor) is someone who just needs to let their aggression out on others. People of other religions are the convenient target.
• 

  Finally-Free

  Yes, can't you feel the love? JWs insist they go out "preaching" because they "love their neighbours", but we all know that's a pile of crap. Just remember, every time one of those lying, smiling bastards comes to your door, we know they would much rather say things like what's posted above. But they're too cowardly to come out and say what they're really thinking.

  W