by beaver_shots 48 Replies latest jw friends
Welcome Kyle,
I liked your story of how you got yourself out of it; I wish that I could have went more that route...
As for getting your mom out, and helping the relationship you have with her, you might find Steven Hassan's website and books interesting.
Also regarding guilt, you're already aware that your ma tries to use that to manipulate you; become more aware of how its used and why it might work.
Good luck.
Hi Beaver/Kyle, welcome to the board. Glad you are out of the org and living a happy, healthy life.
Love Bubble/Marie. XXX
Hi and welcome. What a great story! Kudos to you for getting yourself enrolled at school..
Part of me wishes I could open her eyes but on the other hand I dont know if would want to take something from her that is such a big part of her life. My sister is still there too. I feel like they are lost in a dream land some where out of touch with reality.
I can so relate to this. It is so tempting to throw some crackerjacks into their lives by giving them a picture of how thoroughly they've been manipulated and what a waste all of their efforts are. But... they're happy, at least they think they're happy. Sure, we're happy, but it took a long time to get through that ugly period of confusion and get to the happy part. They are definitely lost in a dream; a long way from reality, but I think that as long as they're where they want to be, they should be left to it.
The moment that any of them start questioning things and getting confused and I hear about it, I'll be there for them, but as their happiness is their own responsibility, I'm letting them be for as long as they think they have all of the answers.
Hi Kyle,
Welcome to the forum and thanks for sharing your story with us.
You sure are a bright spark. I was a born in too, but I didn't wake up nearly as early as you did.
Like you, I never got baptised. This is a real bonus. We get to keep our families to some degree. We can't push it though. They will shun us if we push it too far. Tread carefully and just drop seeds of doubt without antagonising anyone.
When I found this place it was like a breath of fresh air. Stick around and enjoy it too.
Cheers
Chris
Welcome Beaver, your story is typical in fact of many JW children growing up in the unnatural environment of a demanding and unloving cult that's geared for conflict with everyone else.
Surely you will find here many that can identify with the way you feel.
thanks every one. Seems one of the more friendly forums I have been too.
I plan to start working with my mother a little more. The way Im comeing to see things the more I think about it is that she would probly try and help me if the tables where turned so I sort of feel I owe it to her in a way.
kyle-
Love the name :P
I was yanked out of junior high and placed in home school (boys lol), I had to throw a major hissy fit and threaten to go enroll myself to be able to finish my grade 12 at an actual school, with you know teachers and actual learning tools.
Jgnat is a wonderful poster on here who always has the best advice.
Dams
yes I have to say my greatist weekness has and always will be the opposit sex. I was able to keep my dealings with "woldly" girls secret from my parents for quit a while. The Jw life teaches you to be two people with out batting an eye. Not something to be proud of. I dont think I knew one other Jw youth that didnt lead the "double life" to some extent. Even to this day I can lie to some ones face if I want to, almost with out even knowing Im doing it. Its like you belive it your self when it comes out of your mouth just for that second. Not saying Im a patho lier or any thing but its easy to manipulate others when you have been less then truthfull for most of your child/teen age life.
kyle-
I know what you mean. It's a safety mechanism that is hard to break sometimes.
I always got ratted out by the other JWS in my class. Was always in trouyble for boys.
Dams
Kyle,
Its a pleasure to meet you! Welcome! You will find much support here, as I have. It's funny, I too, am one of those ghosts of this forum. We kind of just float around and read and recieve the encouragement we need to re-emphasize that we made the right choice.
Your story is inspiring and I laughed out loud when I read how you rode your bike to school to enroll. That shows sheer determination. I would have loved to been witness to what the school said to your parents to allow you to go. Good for you!
Good luck and happy reading...CC
