I'm being hunted by an elder - would this work?

by serendipity 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • cyberdyne systems 101
    cyberdyne systems 101

    Chances are with his busy schedule (especially at the meeting) he may not even mention anything. I remember a mate of mine and his marriage was failing and an Elder asked him in front of the whole group if his wife was ok (she had not attended for months) he simply replied 'yes she's fine' , I think this approach threw the Elder off balance, I mean what do you say next to that reply unless your a kamikaze person who wants to out all the potencially sorded details in front of everyone?

    Again using that approach, if he came up to you and mentioned about coming round you can simply reply 'yes I know I was in'. They only have power and authority over us because we give that to them, as soon as we stop doing that, it melts away.

    CS 101

  • Joe Grundy
    Joe Grundy

    I'd be happy to give you my Cyprus cellphone number and you can tell the elder to call me for any information he needs.

    I could use all the Greek words I know during my conversation which wouldn't get either of us very far 'cos apart from the very basics, all the Greek words I know are names of restaurant dishes.

    But at least he'd be able to file some sort of report to his ubergruppenfuerher.

    Let me know if you think this would help.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    I told the elders they were to stop trying to communicate with me, and I warned them to stop trespassing on my property. I haven't heard a peep out of them since. Now I no longer wonder who's calling on the phone, who's knocking on my door, or who is stalking me. I don't have to hide anything from anyone. I don't have to explain anything to anyone.

    W

  • serendipity
    serendipity
    Thirdson: Did this elder turn up alone?

    No, he was accompanied by another person both times.

    Vitty: Can I ask how old your daughter is ? Why does she want to go ? And why are you considering taking her ?

    She's 17 and thinks we need to go to a meeting every once in awhile to please God. I'm trying to do a slow fade to avoid losing the extended family. My daughter is not baptized or active at all, so I'm hopeful she'll fade with me, eventually.

    To all of you thanks for your comments.

  • JT
    JT

  • JT
    JT

  • JT
    JT

    She's 17 and thinks we need to go to a meeting every once in awhile to please God. I'm trying to do a slow fade to avoid losing the extended family. My daughter is not baptized or active at all, so I'm hopeful she'll fade with me, eventually

    are you sharing any ofd the things you are learning about the org, for if not she has no REASON to fadfe?

    you may want to ck randy waters site there is the finest exp i have ever read of an elder who got his family out by helping them to SEE THEM TO SEE FOR THEMSELVES as to whether they should continue-

    just asking

  • hamsterbait
    hamsterbait

    THIS IS HOW THEY OPERATE!!!

    The whole intention is to keep you playing their stupid emotional games.

    When they were ignoring you , you were SO sad they werebeing so MEAN. ( you were the victim)

    Now it seems they have picked up that you don't care any more and want to be left in peace. So now, instead of being the loveless shunners, they are become the persecutors.

    I did TA, and what is happening is the triangle of persecutor/rescuer /victim.

    Once you see how gamey the behavior of Dubs is you will just want to stop playing. I do, and am getting better at disengaging. They are the ones left spitting ash and feathers.

    HB

  • Honeybee
    Honeybee

    Run- Don't walk to the nearest exit. The elder will attempt to engage you in conversation that is designed to uncover your doubts. Once in the open you will become the target of an ongoing attempt to expose all others like you so they can "help," you see the light (usually the train at the end of the tunnel,)and/or cleanse the congregation of what they precive to be a threat. Once a doubt is uncovered- they will undermine your standing in the congregation and others will outwardly mark you. They will speak with your children in order to uncover what you say in your home, and if your child defends you or refuses to cooperate, they will go for the child too. As one friendly insider once told me- dont ever meet with these men alone- even for a minute. They act as a witness for each other yet insist on you meeting alone so you won't have be able to prove anything.

  • serendipity
    serendipity
    JT: are you sharing any ofd the things you are learning about the org, for if not she has no REASON to fadfe?

    I've shared a few things, but she's not particularly interested in conversations about the org, or the Bible. She's at best, a nominal JW, which gives me hope.

    I have read the account at freeminds, and I do use the tactic of asking questions. She's labelled the WTS comments on Higher education as propaganda, so she's no dummy.

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