I went to a ex-jw's potluck the other day and it will be my last time going. There were about 20 ex-jw's there just bashing the Watchtower Society for 2 hours. I had all I could take and left. I know initially when JW's come out of the WTS they need a support group with people that understand the way that they feel. I know when I left in 1993 there was a small support system like it is today. I did not have access to the internet and I was too afraid to look at Apostate literature. But what I don't understand is when a person has been out for over 10 years why do they still bash the WTS? One of the guys at the potluck is an ex-elder and he spends his life picketing at JW's assemblies. His son also an ex-MS carries signs at Assemblies. I saw one young girl that just left the WTS get up and leave. I saw her later on as we were in our cars at a supermarket and we talked for about an hour. She told me that "Apostates" scare her because they are so "angry" and she wants to be around "happy" people. So we enchanged phone numbers and we promised not to "bash:" the WTS. I love my life now I got my College degree and I am working on my BA degree. I spend so much time doing positive things that I won't let negatives thoughts of any kind keep me down. I spent many, mnay years in the WTS and like leaving an abusive job or workplace you have to move on and live you life. Ex-JWs that are now born-again are constantly talking about how miserable they were in the WTS but they still seem miserable to me now that they are out of the WTS.
When are ex-jws/Apostates going to get on with their lives?
by booker-t 38 Replies latest jw friends
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blondie
I would take it that you have never been part of a support group for:
recoverning alcoholics
recovering drug addicts
survivors of rape
survivors of child abuse
survivors of domestic abuse
etc.
In my experience, no one ever reaches the point where the never remember the abuse, the problems arising out of their addiction, etc. But they can remember it without pain and revenge. It takes longer for some than others; others stay to help new people so they don't have to stumble in the dark to find their way.
Blondie
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dido
Some ex`s have lost loved ones, or a large chunk of their lives to WS, so they are entitled to bash it forever as far as i`m concerned. If it makes them feel better, then let them do it, if you don`t like it, then you don`t have to go to the meet`s do you?
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banished1
Interesting Booker. I think you should be glad you are so well adjusted and happy and have put away your sorrow and anger and have moved on. But people heal from their wounds and experiences at different rates. Also dont forget how much fun it is to bash something that mistreated you! Getting together is an opportunity to throw stones at and smear the ones who enslaved you and then expelled you after so many years.
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megsmomma
I know what you mean about wanting to be around happy people....it leaves you with a good feeling. However I think the main reason that makes it hard to get over being upset with the JW's is the effects that are still are going on in a-lot of people's lives. I am disowned by my mom and my 8 yr old is being raised as a JW. I deal with things regarding the wtbts every day of my life....but I do leave it in Gods hands to help those still being brainwashed and try my best to not be bitter and angry.
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daystar
I hear ya booker! When we in Texas get tired of talking about the WBTS, we just start prodding the visiting Europeans to try saying "I'm goin' ta open up a can a whup ass!" It's a hoot!
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jaguarbass
Some people are just going to be miserable no matter what. Thats the way they are wired and they havent bothered to change. So avoid those people. And then some people need a hobby or an avocation in life. I think thats why a great many become witnesses to begin with, something to do. When they stop being jws they need something else. Its just the human condition
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parakeet
***But what I don't understand is when a person has been out for over 10 years why do they still bash the WTS?***
I've been out for more than 25 years, and I've gotten on with my life big-time -- marriage, children, career. That doesn't mean I'm going to turn my back on the misery the WTS has caused me, my sibs and my parents and the misery the WTS still causes every day of its existence. I set aside time every day to check this site and others to keep track of what the WTS is up to. My parents are still in the org, and I need to know for their sakes what dumb things they are currently being taught that might impact their health or well-being.
I liken my situation to a refugee who has fled a totalitarian nation. The refugee makes good use of his time in a free country, but he never forgets the loved ones he left behind; he tries to get them out or at least try to make them as comfortable and happy as they can be living in under an abusive government.
If and when the WTS ceases to exist, we "apostates" will then be able to stop exposing and criticizing the WTS and its lies. -
The wanderer
Dear Booker T:
The questions you raise regarding this topic are understandable.
However, it must be remembered that there are two sides to every
story.
True, the former Jehovah's Witnesses bash the Watchtower
frequently; and perhaps should move on with there lives.
On the other hand, many of these people gave everything of their
lives to this organization only to find out that the organization
is a big scam.
The feelings of being deceived, lied to, and taken advantage of, can
sometimes last years, even a lifetime.
Respectfully,
The Wanderer -
fullofdoubtnow
The wts "bash" those who leave for the rest of their lives. They do it by ordering, under threat of discipline, the family and friends they leave behind to treat the ones who leave as if they no longer exist.
Don't you think an organisation that instructs it's followers to behave in such a way deserves all the "bashing" it gets? I do.