I would have been charmed to see a man raising his child on his own
Sorry, I forgot who said this. I can vouch for this statement from personal observation. I was a member of a single parent group for twenty years. We had one single dad. He didn't stay single very long. He was a babe MAGNET! For a woman in her LATE childbearing years, adopting a husband AND a child at the same time can seem like a touch of heaven.
I think, as a society, we are culturally biased that the mom MUST be good. I know I'm guilty of it. I still remember my disgust at seeing two motherly figures stagger out of the local seedy bar one late afternoon. My first thought? "Where are their children?" I'd never thought the same when I'd seen men stagger out.
It is a horror in our society to think of a child raised by a mother who DOES NOT love him. If the mother is not a nurturer, or frankly hates parental responsibility, this cultural bias can lead to some bad outcomes.
- The mother, perhaps harboring deep resentment, raises the children anyways. She raises deeply insecure or scarred children.
- The mother has her children taken away and spends the next fifteen years fighting to get them back. The children, their home constantly in dispute, are unadoptable. The children are raised rootless.
- The mother walks away from her responsibility and becomes an instant pariah.
I hate to say it, but I think option three is the bravest, for a mother who knows she can't do it. At least the children have a hope for stability and love.
NOW, back to the topic at hand. Since men can more easily walk away from their responsibility in our society, a man who accepts it gladly is a HUGE turn-on. You have nothing to fear, Avishai. One word of caution, don't introduce new dates to your child too early. Your little family unit is very important to your child. Any shakeup of their little world will likely NOT be welcomed. The lady you introduce to your child should be a "keeper".
