I hate it when they make me cry!! (page 2)

codeblue

(((Scully))) So sorry...

I totally understand....I encountered the same problem on a visit last week. I visited some JW friends (nice people) and with my son (still in the JWs)...

It hurts like hell.

Robdar

Your experience is making me cry too.

(((((Scully)))))

Don't feel bad about crying. You were able to form some great ties and memories in the past - something a number of people never genuinely get to experience - losing those hurts. You're being able to still value them means you're definitely not marred with the dub black and white view of the world. Maybe some day a few of those old friends will be able to do the same.

BizzyBee

Oy, Scully! I know just the type of people you mean. It breaks your heart that they have been so loyal (though misguided) so sincere, (though misled) and so sweet (though manipulated). And they reap the same human frailties, and a vulnerable to the same ills as the less loyal, insincere and unkind of this world. And over-riding it -all is - what a waste of human effort and hope and goodwill! How mis-used and un-appreciated are these good folk. And how we miss them. So sad.

canadian girl

Well here is my story...

My mum is now a devoted JW. Only for the past couple of years , mind you. It was my 40th Birthday yesterday and I did not even get so much as a Happy Birthday honey. When my mum first "joined" I asked her how this was going to effect our family now. I was told that nothing would change. I have her only 4 grandchildren. Last year nothing did change, but all that apparently seemed to change this year at mothers day. I was informed, when I took her a mothers day gift that they were not allowed to celebrate this holiday I said well I do amd always will. What am I supposed to do? Yesterday it broke my heart. My husband was so furious that he wants to go to one of her "meetings" and tell them all what he thinks of them.

Please help me understand this

.

Arthur

canadian girl:

I'm sorry to hear about this. I was perhaps a little gruff with you on the other thread; and I apologize. I did not know that you were going through something like this.

The subject of holidays is one which could take up hours of time. Let me try to make it really brief and to the point:

Jehovah's Witnesses are taught that almost all holidays have pagan religious origins; and therefore are unacceptable for Christians to celebrate. JWs sincerely believe that they would be displeasing Jehovah God and Jesus Christ if they celebrated these holidays. JWs are also taught that the Governing Body aka, the "Faithful Slave" have the right to dictate all matters of conduct and doctrine to fellow worshipers; as they have been entrusted by Jesus Christ to do so.

JWs trully believe that the Watchtower Society is God's channel of communication to mankind. They truly believe that this "channel of communication" is the only means to salvation. JWs are one of the most heavily indoctrinated religious groups in the world. There are many of us ex-JWs that believe that the Watchtower Society is a cult. This is certainly my opinion as well.

It is very difficult for people who have never been JWs to understand all of this. All of this seems totally irrational to them. However, I can tell you from personal experience ( I was a faithful JW for 30 years ) that JWs will do many irrational things because they believe that Jehovah God is telling them to do so through the "Spirit Directed Organization". Your mother has simply been indoctrinated by the Watchtower Society's methods of mind control. The Watchtower magazine holds just as much authority in the JW mind as does the Bible itself. The Watchtower magazine is a modern day "Talmud" by which the Governing Body exercises enormous power over JWs.

If you truly want to understand the psychology of JWs, and how the WTS can have so much power over them; I strongly suggest you read the book: "Combatting Cult Mind Control" by Steven Hassan. This book is a fabulous work that fully explains how "mind control" and religious indoctrination. All of the methods of psychological manipulation that are discussed in Hassan's book describe the WTS to a tee. I have the book; and have read it several times. If you read this book from start to finish; you will have a much deeper insight into your mother's thinking and actions.

LittleToe

Scully:

{{{hugs}}}

I have friends that span the spectrum of belief - religous, political, irreligious, apolitical, theist, deist, agnostic, atheist, republican
There are few idealogies that so disrupt the fabric of normal friendships and family life as the JWs. I join you in mourning for them...

CanadianGirl:Keep on doing what you've always done. Hopefully she will eventually come to realise the stupidity of her actions against the backdrop of the love you continue to show.

I've just started a thread on holidays, that might help you understand the madness. You can find it here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/122775/1.ashx

Frannie Banannie

(((((((((((Scully)))))))))))) I know what ya mean, chere. I think for many of us here....there were a very few rare friendships that were true and unhypocritical.

nicolaou

Oh Scully! It sucks doesn't it?

I know our previously enjoyed friendship would probably not withstand the rift between true-blue-JWs and ex-JWs.

Is it worth trying the occasional coffee morning or lunch date? Why not give them (and yourself) the chance? After all, many of us here were 'true-blue-JWs' in a past life, I know I was. I'm not suggesting that you try to set them free just give the friendship a chance to survive.

Agape

delilah

(((((((((((((((((((((( Scully ))))))))))))))))))) I think we all, have at least ONE good friend, we left behind, when we left the organization. And, yes, It does hurt.

I hate it when they make me cry!!