by hambeak 16 Replies latest jw friends
I have seen a lot of posts here that attack pedophiles and want open records which I agree with. Pedophiles are detestable and disgusting.
My question is don't you think some are wrongfully accused by some especially in child custody issues? I know of some that were accused and arrested and in one case the mother in law and wife admitted in pre trial they made the whole thing up. In the mean time the mans life was nearly destroyed. More details later if any one is interested.
You are definitely right. But, with the safety of the children involved, the accusations need to be taken seriously.
I think that investigations could go on quietly, so as not to destroy the innocent's reputation.
The records should not be open to US, but certainly open to investigation.
I know of a depressed teen who accused her father of molesting her, because she did not want the JW life.
It was investigated to death before she admitted why she made it up. No harm to his reputation. I only wish
he learned from his experience that his daughter needed his help more than WTS needed another elder.
I can relate to what you're saying hambeak.
During my son's horrendous divorce from a nutcase, she accused him of abuse w/his 3 yr. old daughter at the time. He was treated guilty before they even looked into it. The Guardian Ad Litem (attorney for the kids) took away his right to call them every evening and he didn't see the kids for 1 whole year until he was cleared. Now that is a crime. In the meantime his wife kept the kids' head filled w/all kinds of wicked things about their Dad.
Now he sees the kids, but a lot of damage from the mother has been done. He WILL NEVER have the kids overnight because of the "justice" system that believes you are guilty of abuse before it is even checked out and it would be very possible that a "cooked" up story could be believed and he would go to prison. He does not want to take that chance.
When his kids are much older perhaps his attitude will change about over night visits. He used to take them camping and they loved that.
Juni
I am guilty of this. If I ever hear someone ws accused of child abuse, I always assume its true, and act accordingly. I am sure there are lots of cases where the person accused is innocent, its just hard for me to believe someone would make something so horrible up.
Juni thanks for your response because I am talking about me. When I left my wife and told her I wanted joint custody of our 4 children that was in Oct. 83 Her mother was so pissed because I left her for a man that she concocted a story that I was a leader of a satanic cult murdered children and molested dozens. The children all said it was all a lie but they were not listened to 4 of my employess were also charged and arrested and it became known as the Sacramento snuff film child molest case. I spent days in jail until I got enough money to post bail. While in jail I was beaten raped (I wear dentures today because of it) I lived on the streets of SF for weeks until I got a job and lived in a slum hotel for year while this was in court. After they admitted making up the whole thing they were never charged with perjury or filing a false police report. I ended up on talk shows AM San Francisco and Oprah Winfrey. You never get over something like this and I believe had a thorough investigation been done by law encorcement it never would have gone that far.
Today my kids minds have been totally poisened by their mother and the borg. They are convinced I am demonized because I am Gay. So I still have a lot of hurt and anger inside me but I have a wonderful partner of more than 20 years now and am financially sound.
Wow hambeak!
Yes they don't prosecute for false accusations. In so many cases women get off the hook easily. Lady Justice is not blind. Laws for the most part are in favor of the woman.
I'm sorry to hear that you suffered and your kids too suffer the affects.
I'm curious about what happend on the Oprah show. I don't watch her much or at all. I really don't watch much TV. I do try to catch the Ellen show. I love her personality.
I wish you the best. Do you get to see your kids at all? I'm sure they are all adults now and can make up their own minds. Though if their mother did a "good" job of brainwashing it's pretty hard for them to think reasonably. Man I feel for you.
Hugs,
Juni PS Are you feeling better now? I believe I read that on the vigil thread.....
Juni yes I am feeling much better now. As for my children there is no positive relationship with them their mother has totally torn them up. 12 years ago my son wanted to come live with me and I was makeing arrangements for him and the next thing everyone disappeared. When my kids found out I was battling CA they got in touch with me and wanted everything I have since worked for and get control of my healthcare. I got an attorney and got that taken care of. On Oprah my attorney and I were there and transcrpts of the case were shown and how the judge even said my mil was toatally mentally disturbed and obsessed all matters sexual those were the judges exact words. My ex and mil were invited but declined to be there.
Ah guy!.......that happens too much when kids have nothing to do w/parents and then are there for the hand out at the end. I certainly wouldn't trust the lot of them w/my health care decisions. Good that you didn't fall for that one. That's awful.
I'm happy that you are in a good place now. Life is too short. But it truly is a sad story.
Juni
In fact one should never judge before hearing both sides of teh story, in theory the case can go both ways until clarified with evidence.
No, not everyone accused is guilty. But in the case of a person repoorting abuse to clergy, they have a responsibility to protect the potential victim first and sort things out after ensuring the safety of any children involved. The courts have the same responsibilty, even when it can hurt the falsely accused. In the case of a false accusation, they should be vigorously prosecuted (when intentionally/maliciously done) to the full extent of criminal and civil law. There is no excuse for such things-as it hurts the children AND the accused in ways that will affect all of them for a lifetiime. That kind of damage is almost unforgivable. Some brutal perjury prosecutions, heavily publicised, would help end the false accusations. No excuse for that kind of crap-no matter WHAT!
Hambeak, my sympathies on the poor way you were treated. I am glad to hear that you are well and happy now. The ex, if still living-did she ever apologise? Repent in any way?
