On the fence (first post)

nonamegiven

Well, I stumbled onto this site and decided, after reading a bit to post.
Who am I? I am "no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses" as they say now, they no longer use the word "disfellowshipped" in the announcments now.
Why am I df'd? Well, I suppose that's not important but it was immorality, not apostasy or anything.
Why am I posting? Well, I really don't know, just wanting to vent I suppose. I stumbled upon this site while delving into the many things I have spent my life learning. I decided that if I am going to regain my standing and continue on as a JW (more on that later) I will only do it whole-hartedly. As a JW growing up I kinda thought df'ing seemed mean, but that was what I was told was right so I went along. Now that I'm df'ed I feel the strong urge to call everyone I know that was df'ed and apologize to them for turning my back on them when they needed me. Now that I'm in thier shoes I know what it's like to not be able to turn to my friends in my time of need. Now, the only ones I can talk to are the very few...well one actually..... friend that I cultivated friendshop with that is not a JW. See, now in my time of need I have been stripped of my family and friends and have no body to turn to except the elders. During my judicial comittee meeting it became evident that they were not sheparding with a shepards staph but with a warriors sword. It was not about helping me but about punishing me so I don't see me turning them for help.
I've been intrigued by some of what I've read here and some of it I kinda dismiss because I can tell there is much anger and that taints perspectives.
Will I continue as a JW?? Man, I have no idea! At this point, my aim is to be reinstated so I can talk to my family and friends again. I'm taking this time to really disect every teaching from many perspectives to get a REAL idea of what the bible says. But I do have a dilema though. IF I decide that I do not agree with what is being taught I can't tell anyone (wife included) that I disagree with the prophecies and that I'd like to go my seperate ways. I think I will be labled an apostate and disassociated and will be done for!

Anyway, I suppose that's it for now, thanks for reading.

For now, I'm stradling the fence.

TheKings

something i heard in a public talk is: there is no fence. either you believe it or you don't.

you can not be a true jehovah's witness and doubt any of their teachings (there are some who would disagree with that i'm sure, but that is the nature of the organization.). you need to be true to yourself if you're going to worship god without feeling bad about how you're doing it.

garybuss

Welcome! You wrote: "At this point, my aim is to be reinstated so I can talk to my family and friends again."Dude, you can talk to anybody you want right now. They are the ones who can't talk.

TheKings

BTW

welcome

purplesofa

Hi,

Welcome to the board.

First I want to say I was DF for nine years before returning. All that time it was still the truth to me. Now being reinstated many years, I don't see it as the full on truth anymore.

I can surely empathize with you about wanting to get back to speak with loved ones.

And I also know the lonliness you are feeling.

I think if you read the board some more, and give yourself time, your answers will come to you from inside YOU.

Remember to be true to yourself.

It's a long, soul seaching journey which ever way you go.

purps

OnTheWayOut

Welcome,

whether you are a believer or not, you are welcome here. TheKings is right, the talk said that "Satan owns the fence."

While you are deciding what to do, you can learn much here. The thing is that you might learn that you don't

want to be a JW again. Most people here have come to realize the problems with the organization- hypocrisy,

twisting ancient Greek to fit doctrine, doctrine that ignores science and history.

Still, there is nothing wrong with your going back, just to regain family relations. Many of us (myself included)

have decided to become inactive over time, so that we don't get DF'ed. That's called fading.

Just wanted to say one more thing you need to know:

WARNING- You may not be able to fake repentence after you learn the truth.

moomanchu

I kinda dismiss because I can tell there is much anger and that taints perspectives.

Oh yeah !

You need to study and investigate everything you have been taught it's your life no one else's

If it is the truth then why be afraid of anything.

crazyblondeb

bighug

I just wanted to say hello and welcome. Thanks for posting!! I know it's hard to be DF'd. I, too, went back and got reinstated because I missed my family and friends. But, after sitting there during a meeting, I knew I couldn't ever live that way again.

There is anger here. But there is also unconditional love and friendship here!! Something you won't find at the kingdom hall. I hope you stick around and get to know us!!

Be true to yourself. There is so much more to life!! It's time to really enjoy it!!!!!

shelley

Terry

What you might find is that you are so indoctrinated to believe everything you were taught you will continue to hold all the same values, judgements and restrictions on thinking and evaluating as before.

To leave Jehovah's Witnesses is to leave being absolutely and totally convinced you are right and everybody else is wrong. That is a comfort hard to do without. It is a powerful drug.

You'll begin to think of everything as black and white; either/or.

You'll have cravings for meetings and being told what to do and how to think and you'll look around in other religions for an alternative. However, it is practically impossible to leap into the fire from the frying pan. So, you'll try and sort out your feelings about going back to the Kingdom hall and eating humble pie.

You have to figure out how to think for yourself. JW's don't know how! It is all following orders.

You don't need people telling you how to think. What you need is a methodology for sorting out what is factual and what is mere opinion.

Religion is somebody pulling things out of their ass and claiming it comes from God's lips. The smell should tip you off.

The content of the Watchtower magazine for over a hundred years has been crackpot imagination with a zillion scriptures propping it up. You can cut the crap, however, rather easily.

If the Watchtower was Jehovah's mouthpiece and it has never been right about prophecy that should end the discussion right there! The fact is the Watchtower and the Governing Body have a 100% record of being dead wrong about everything they ever predicted.

Check it out for yourself.

If that is true (and it is) why even bother with the rest?

The next step is reading some early history of Christianity and how the bible was formed. That should dash cold water in your face in a hurry.

There has never been a Christianity that agreed on anything important or that had just ONE infallible leadership.

It is myth start to finish.

From there you can begin to think for yourself and build your own life around rational thinking.

Good hunting!

truthsetsonefree

Welcome. tsof

On the fence (first post)

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