I was earnestly praying to serve Jehovah and give him my all.
In short order I found I was heading toward the unthinkable. I was on my way out of the Watchtower and the only life I had ever known.
Pretty ironic.
What about you?
by MegaDude 22 Replies latest jw friends
I was earnestly praying to serve Jehovah and give him my all.
In short order I found I was heading toward the unthinkable. I was on my way out of the Watchtower and the only life I had ever known.
Pretty ironic.
What about you?
I was always praying to Jehovah to help me to get my spiritual life together. I could never keep up with all the studying, service, and meeting attendance. I felt guilty all the time because I was just not measuring up.
I also prayed every day, several times a day, for my husband and children to become witnesses. I was so afraid of them dying at Armageddon. I was filled with grief over it at times, but kept telling myself that Jehovah would answer these prayers.
My oldest son has serious drug and alcohol problems and has been a big worry to me. I prayed daily, several times a day, for him as well in regards to these problems. I did ask for Jehovah's will to be done in his life, hoping that Jehovah's will would be to help him become clean and sober.
I still pray for my family, of course, but I am not full of the fear and guilt that I carried for so many years.
I was praying more ardently than I ever have before or since.
I was asking "Jehovah" if this was indeed, his organization, if shunning was right, for him to please, please show me HOW it was right... and asking him if he was as sickened by it as I was. I wanted a sign to stay.
Yes. Ironic, indeed.
Baba.
I was constantly praying to keep my mind clean and not have "gay" thoughts. i guess i just loved females too much. i was praying for him to take away my feelings for a certain female....
...the same female i ended up spending these last two and a half years with and going strong still
*starts singing*
"and isnt it ironic? dont ya think?"
I remember sitting at an assembly and praying to just feel something. I felt totally unmoved by the "spiritual food" and kinda dead inside. I wasn't getting any encouragement and somehow thought it was my fault. I wasn't doing anything wrong and met all their "requirements", but I felt totally numb.
Now I know why the spirit never helped me -it wasn't there.
I always prayed that we would eat pizza on friday. Friday was take-out day.
Yeah, last time I prayed for something I was 10 :P .
"i guess i just loved females too much."
Ditto!
When I was a JW teenager one recurrent prayer of mine was Psalm 86:11 (NWT):
Instruct me, O Jehovah, about your way
I shall walk in your truth.
Unify my heart to fear your name.
You can tell how divided I felt.
Shortly before I left (first in my mind) I was increasingly fascinated by the "God is love" motto and prayed to live by love.
gay pride, have you seen this thread?
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/123637/1.ashx
Letsee, what have I been praying about lately? God, if you exist, help me not compromise"
ironic, no?
I prayed for him to show me that the WTS was the truth, and if it was not, to show me that it wasn't.
Some would say he answered that prayer.
I was praying to know if this was the truth or not, and to work things out with the father of my child.
I am now married to him, and have not been to a meeting in 2 years. I think I finally had some answered prayers.