What should I do?

by lmspink 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • choosing life
    choosing life

    Sounds like lots of good advice. Visiting them alone the first time to just talk would be good. However, don't be too hard on them. They may have had a change of heart about the need to connect with their family.

    Still, don't allow them to break your rules with your child. They would not do that for you. I agree to try and build a bridge here. They have been controlled by a cruel policy of a mind control group. Of coarse they still own their actions. But wouldn't you prefer to be able to build some kind of loving relationship with them, if possible? Only time will tell if they are sincere.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    My 2 cents?

    Let them back in your life, with a brief and kind conversation that let's them know how hateful it was to 'shun' you all those years.

    Prove that 'forgiveness' comes from you not them - that you were the one mishandled and treated like refuse. If it was me, I would make sure they know that 'shunning' can go both ways if they attempt to ever indoctrinate your children with the lies they believe.

    Jeff

  • becca1
    becca1

    "Blood is thicker than water". You parents are finally realizing what shunning really means and how much they have to loose. Take this as an opportunity to mend fences. As for indoctrinating the child, they can't do it if you don't allow it. At some point in the future bring up the subject and just state that you would appreciate it if they do not discuss religion or the Bible with your children. Be very clear with everyone what their roles are in the family. But above all enjoy your family.

  • MF2
    MF2

    Sorry to be cynical - but is there a chance they might seek custody of the child somehow? Does the Watchtower somehow coach grandparents who are "in" to seek openings for legal challenges to the parents? I don't mean to judge your parents harshly but could this happen?

  • lmspink
    lmspink

    Thanks everyone for your advice. Even though I know things will never be normal with my family again I'm pretty sure I'm doing the right thing by letting them see my son. I'm the one with the control now. They know that if they slip up they will never see him again. I just don't want my son to get to the age where he knows whats going on & I have to pull him away from them. I know they will never leave the religion even though only 1 of their 4 kids still attends the meetings. At the end of the day I feel good that since I have been disfellowshipped I have done right by them I invited them to my Engagement & Wedding even though I knew they wouldn't come and I'm the one that has had the guts to try & fix things. Anyway thanks again for your support & I'll keep you posted, Lu

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