If Hell Were a Toilet...

Sparkplug

I am going straight there! I am having surgery tomorrow and the kind doc gave me a great and wonderful gunk to mix with a half gallon of gatorade. So, they call it bowel prep. Prep for what I ask? Hades. OMG. I think I am dying and I am not even at the hospital yet.

At any rate, I am getting a bit nervous. Ok, really scared. But people do this all the time right? (Thats what a friend told me)

So it will be a few days till I can get back on, but then hang on Jesus, we are going for a ride! 6 weeks and a few of them with nothing but a laptop! There is writing to be done and I need to do it!

See you all, but hopefully not in toilet hell!

Decki

hambeak

Decki I love you and as the song says I'll be there see you tomorrow night. I just need to find the right gift for you you are such a sweet person. I think I will adopt you ok?

Abandoned

Good luck!

Now as for toilet hell, better that than toilet jw paradise. Can't you just all picture it. Only the choicest pieces of crap make it there and that only after remaining in their crappy state until the end. HA HA HA!!!

bikerchic

alt

TMI Decki!

alt thinking positive healing thoughts for you girl!

Sparkplug

Oh Hambeak, I have always wanted a dad and a gay one with style and a burly guitar playing partner, well I am so in! You make me cry you know? I mean this all with the best of love. When I get nervous I tend to joke. Pretty nervous now. Perfect gift is having friends and (dads) there. I was feeling realy dumb that I had nobody to go with me until my roommate let me know he can take me and he will help check me in and such.

We will see you on the other side of the table.

Abandoned- Pretty funny. Your imagination is just swell!

Gotta run...no pun intended!

Sparkplug

bikerchick- sorry. How is it that all these people having surgeries never tell us of this stuff. BOY!! I feel a bit humbled in front of my two male roommates and three kids.

Scully

Sparky

You'll find out the true meaning of "humility" tomorrow... especially if the procedure you're having is called a colonoscopy.

just kidding... well, kinda.... just make sure you ask for a nice strong sedative before they start... so you can be in la-la-land and not have a care in the world...

Sparkplug

"humility" tomorrow

Sounds like an Annie song. lol

No, but the bladder test was bad. They hooked me up to all these tubes, plugs and what looked like a power strip for more tubes.... and then the kind ladies just sat there and said ..."go pee." Uh. I got stage fright. Then the filled my bladder for me and watched as they told me to cough push, cough, laugh and well you get the picture. What a freak the person who made that test up was.

No I am having a lyproscopic hystorectomy (sp?) and I think a sling on my bladder. It just depends what all is going on to what extent the operation will be done. It may be more than just lyproscopic for they may take my last ovary and cervix, but the uterus is going for sure. I can't remember who told me to sell it on E-bay and when I told that to the preop lady she took me so serious. She said that no I could not have it for it has to go to be tested for cancer...blah blah blah. Boy did I feel stupid then. I started laughing at her stern manner till I realized I did not want this decendant of the Huns on my bad side.

Think of the money I could make as a fertility ritual tool seeing I am an overachiever in the baby department. All these great babies on one ovary. I think I have had enough blessings on this and am ready to turn in this pain in my side for a real life!

Sparkplug

ps. Skully, it puts a new meaning on "bet your bottom dollar on tomorrow".

lol

BabaYaga

Wow... all the best, Darlin'...

Strength, nothing but GOOD NEWS, and F A S T healing to you.

Damn, your babes are GORGEOUS, all of that from one ovary? Little Ms. Ovary has done her job well. You can have a little ritual to send her to her rest later.

Hugs
Baba.

If Hell Were a Toilet...

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