Wow for me I was in somewhat shock, I have Randall Watters book that i bought abt 13 yrs ago from a guest spkr at my church, but reading the testimonies of everyone, the pain the WT causes, makes it more of a reality. My sis was a jdub for 25 yrs( now ex-jw), but never carried on like such with her siblings and homies ( may I say). However, she was a lil judgmental, but who isnt at times. For the most part I'm grateful to JWD for it helps me to understand alot my husband is going thru being he studies with them. There has been a lil more Peace in our home since I found this site. Thanks to all that contribute!!!
What emotions were you feeling as you started reading the posts on JWD?
by What-A-Coincidence 26 Replies latest jw friends
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serendipity
I felt guilt because I wasn't supposed to be reading this, according to the WTS. I felt relief because I knew others felt the same way that I did about the org. I felt great sadness because so many were hurt or are hurting due to actions by other JWs.
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BlackSwan of Memphis
When I was researching things I read a couple of posts (I think) and didn't think too much about it.
But I didn't lurk too much other then that.
After I realized it wasn't the truth I had believed in for so long, I came back round and lurked and read posts. I was upset, hurt. But nothing that I hadn't already figured out was going on.
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SB
i was so angry, and really upset the whole week at work, everyone wondered why. i felt stupid, hurt, some more stupid, then some more hurt. but this board has been the single most effective outside source in me coming to terms that my thoughts and beliefs CAN'T be controlled anymore, even if i wanted that "security" and warm fuzzy feeling of being a "pillar" in the congregation. it's an impossibility now, and i realize that many many many people around the world have gone through the exact same thing, so i can too.
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Gordy
I first looked at Freeminds which led me to here.
My first thought was "WOW!"
I couldn't read enough.
It made me realise that I had not gone through something unique to me. But other JW's had and were going through similar.
It became my door to the way out of the Watchtower.
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blondie
I was elated to see others with the same ideas I had found in my research. I started really checking things on the internet. I was scared that my husband would find out that on was reading "apostate" material. Eventually though we both left.
Blondie
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TopHat
I thought, At last! Someone I ask questions and get answers to about the Watchtower org.
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choosing life
I was excited and scared at the same time. Excited that I had found others who could see that things were not right in the organization. I realized that I was not just crazy. Scared that I would get caught reading the forbidden fruit. I felt like a kid whose parents were looking over their shoulder.
The hardest part was and still is that I cannot share much of what I know with my family. There were times when posts made me sad or angry because of all the turmoil that this religion has caused. I hate the way it has broken up families and shattered people's lives. But most of all, it has given me a way to communicate with others and kept me from going back to the Witnesses just for the association and because of family pressure.
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return visitor
I remember when I first started reading the posts that most people writing them seemed to have an axe to grind with the organization and I was very skepticle of what I was reading, apostates i thought. But I kept reading, and every now and then some statement made could be verified using either the orgs. own literature or just common sense. Then I came across the UN thing and WOW that did it for me. No turning back, no maybe its the Truth, it was over for me at the moment I verified that it was indeed true.
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becca1
I looked at this site briefly over a year ago. I felt guilty and "unclean". I begged Jehovah for forgivness. Then, last summer, I started looking at "apostate" sites again and came back here. I hit on a thread that spoke of the UN scandal. I thought: "No way". I went to the UN's site and saw the letter. I scoured the UN's site, read the Charter and read and re-read the conditions for associating with DPI. At some point, felt I had trully come to a turning point in my life, and though I was all alone, I said out loud: "It's over".