Need a little advice on this

by hambeak 19 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  hambeak

  The owners of my business cannot meet payroll and have not paid a lot of bills.

  The owner of the place I used to manage wants me back at twice the salary I make now but doesn't want Jake there. I accepted and Jake is very upset. He wants me to look for something we can both work together and I really don't want to. He is not a prejudiced man but has a very foul mouth calls blacks the n word and gays the f word and whites the red neck crap he hates car repair and just wants to play music but can't make a living at that. So I told him I can support us at this other job and he can play his music but I will control his expenses unless he gets a job to make his own money. He just spent 1000.00 on an amp today and didn't tell me I am pissed to say the least. So what do I do He is content to be poor and I am not. Any advice he is 60 and I am 55 not exactly employable in todays job market. Blues music does not sell and I remember buying all the equipment and waiting tables to support this and I will not do it again.
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  Show him the budget. Tell him that you absolutely have to stick by the budget
  unless he gets a job. THEN STICK BY THE BUDGET.

  If you show him that he can have $43.67 a week in mad money, then give him that,
  and nothing else.
• 

  hambeak

  He is very expensive to maintain almost 600.00 a week
• 

  orbison11

  "He wants me to look for something we can both work together"
  
  fair enough,

  now you "want him to make $2 million a year"

  lol, i dont want to get started with what i think, other than have a merry xmas, or a happy holiday

  wendy
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  I would never want to work at the same place as my wife. I enjoy being
  my work self, not having to be my home self.

  The real issue is the money. You have a good job. You need to work
  where you can earn good money. He should at least get a part-time
  job for his amp and other incidentals. Tell him that.
• 

  Kaput

  Show him the budget.

  How 'bout show him the door.
• 

  JWdaughter

  It doesn't seem like he wants to be a grown up. I guess if you want to be in a relationship that you have to give a person an allowance, that is up to you. I would suggest separating your money/accounts, so that he can't ruin your credit or buy amps with money that you have earned. If you are going to be the provider and he the teenager, then all his toys should be purchased with his money. Just my opinion.
• 

  juni

  JWdaughter said:

  It doesn't seem like he wants to be a grown up. I guess if you want to be in a relationship that you have to give a person an allowance, that is up to you. I would suggest separating your money/accounts, so that he can't ruin your credit or buy amps with money that you have earned. If you are going to be the provider and he the teenager, then all his toys should be purchased with his money. Just my opinion

  Gary I have to agree. $600 a week!!! allowance. Eeee gads. You're right. At our age it is hard to find a job. If you have that opportunity I'd take it. You're not saying he can't pursue his music, but if it does nothing to help w/expenses then he should find a job besides. If he can't stand to be separated from you while working.......well I think you know the answer.

  Wouldn't you like a breath of fresh air and unload all of that baggage? Or at least set boundaries so that you are not living your life in a strangle hold.

  Juni PS Gary, you said that Jake doesn't care if he lives a poor life, but sounds to me for someone who feels that way his tastes are quite rich ($1000 amp). Also, you want to spend your life taking care of him (someone you don't respect because of his language and prejudices) while he plays? and spends your hard earned money? What does he contribute to the relationship? Not looking for you to answer; just think about it.
• 

  Abandoned

  He is very expensive to maintain almost 600.00 a week

  No offense, but I've NEVER heard about an orgasm that expensive.
• 

  hambeak

  Oh he is pouting now and we had a big argument. I told him I can cover everything with the other job. But I can't just let him spend money on what he wants when I spend money on bills and rent car payment and insurance He says he has to think about it and I said go ahead and do what you want to do because I can do what I want and make a good living witout your expensive habit of this music bullshit. So I guess I will be single soon because this is rediculous 10 guitars 5 amps and to much to mention and I have to scrape to get a new pair of pants LOL what the fu8k Just my lot in life just work and pay the damn bills this sucks and I do all the cooking and cleaning while he is on my space and looks at his pictures GOD I AM SO PISSED but I will get over it