Why I'm mad at god.

by Abandoned 45 Replies latest jw friends

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    The past couple of days, I've been posting a lot about how disappointed and even disgusted I am with god and how he runs his universe. I guess that probably offends some people. I don't intend to make people feel bad, but here's what's been going on in my life lately:

    A week ago friday (december 15th) I confronted one of my co-workers regarding unwanted, sexual advances. He immediately denied everything and accused me of being homophobic and went as far as to make an official complaint against me. To put this into perspective, I went to him instead of going to management so we could work this out without there being any disciplinary action. He went straight to the boss which now makes my complaint look like I'm just doing it in retaliation. I don't ever remember him doing anything when anyone else was around so I feel, once again, abandoned. Yeah, a bit melodramatic, but I'm really sick and tired of this shit.

    Last Friday (december 22nd) the boss and his brother sequestered me to get "my side of the story." Giving my side of the story, however, involved answering the same question about forty times. Each time I gave the same answer, but always the conversation would lead back to the same thing. They wanted to know the exact dates I felt I was harrassed and exactly what was said and done. Where we were. Who else might have been around at the time. All great questions, but I have no answers as I've been repressing this until I decided to confront him and even then I didn't think I was going to have to defend myself. Yeah, I guess I'm a bit naive.

    I don't know how many more unsolvable problems I can take being tossed on top of my load. I really don't. There are some bright spots in my life, but the crap is getting to the point to where I'm losing my will to fight. I'm in debt so bad due to the whole mexican marriage and a failed suicide attempt last year, that I don't think I'll ever see myself over that hill. I didn't have the money when they put me in the hospital and I don't have it now and I don't want it either, I just don't understand how anyone could think trying to collect thirty thousand dollars from someone who's life is at a point to where they want to end it all is not a fucking red flag to maybe see if there's some program available to help. I don't get it.

    I'm working two entry level jobs because the supervisor I was dating this time last year, decided that since I didn't want to go out with her, I didn't deserve my hard-earned reputation at the place we both worked at. And since our mutual boss was her friend before either of them had ever heard of me, it was a rather easy process to harrass me out. I should have stood up and fought then, but they wrote up a VA (vulnerable adult) issue against me over a medication notation error which was just pure nonsense. Basically, one night when I was in charge of medications we had a resident who was agitated and violent. The policy of the place is to not send the resident in for pshych eval unless they are violent towards another resident. If they are just violent toward staff, then we just try to keep them to themselves and monitor them. Well, this guy wouldn't let staff change his clothes or do anything so he ended up having his TEDS socks on when my shift was over, but I had signed the MAR saying that they were taken off. It's a stupid error since the care managers generally take the TEDS off. The med passer doesn't normally deal with it. Well, we did log that he was agitated and violent and that we couldn't get him into his PJs but since I didn't specifically state that his TEDS were still on, I was given a VA.

    I argued that the night crew, whether I wrote a specific note or not, should also have had the responsibility of checking on him and if they were able to, they would see he still had them on (they did know we couldn't change him) and if they couldn't then it would be two shifts that weren't able to calm or help the resident and thus it obviously wasn't the fault of just one person. I wrote out my rebuttal and attached it to their complaint, but the whole thing let me know that they were going for my juggular and that eventually they were going to find something to pin on me. Such is the situation in working with elderly with extreme memory loss. Anyway, I left that job before they could completely ruin my reputation, but the whole thing left me so tired of fighting.

    I don't know what else to say, but I feel that the name I chose when I signed on here, abandoned, is so very apropos of my relationship with god. I can't imagine for a second why things have to be so tough. Maybe I'm just a complainer, but I just feel so sick and tired of fighting only to find out that I've only risen up to the bottom. So if you see my posts about what a jerk god is, it isn't that I want to rain on anyone's god-loving parade, I just don't have the motivation to view him with any positive light whatsoever.

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    Dear Abandoned

    I just went through a whole series of one right after another, freaky things at work. I was being blamed for things in several different areas and from different people, different departments.......all unrelated. I began to question my own thought process, If indeed I was screwing so much stuff up and not even knowing it, putting the blame on others.

    It all came to a head one morning when I was not allowed to do something that was my job as a doctor thought I has become totally irresponsable. He said in order to get it done, he would do it himself.

    This was beyond what I could take. I started to put in my resignation. Tears streaming down my face. My job had brought more attention to myself than I ever wanted. I wrote that it had come down to not being able to perform as I was always defending myself over something I had nothing to do with.

    My boss entered the room as I was wrting the resignation. We talked and she suggested to see how I felt in a weeks time. She knew that all these occurances were not my fault and asked me to not get so emotional about them.

    I don't know why so much was hitting me all at one time. Things have calmed down, I am still working hard at changing some policies and procedures to keep my ass covered.

    I have realized some places I work, no matter what goes on, the people I work for are not nearly as smart as I am. I have to move on, i have lost respect for them and cannot stay. I will question myself and discount myself and feel abandoned.

    It's hard, but possibly if you can put emotion aside, work will not be so upsetting. Alot of what happens in the workplace is not personal, just someone else covering their butt or just a dumbass in a position they should not be in.

    If you think God is there to help you, being pissed at him may cause him to let the stuff go on. I am less inclined to help people when they are pissed off at me. If you take control of your life, then if you want to be mad at yourself, be mad, if you don't, make changes. You can create your own peace in life.

    purps

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    sixty-one views and one comment? I can take a clue. I can take a clue.

  • AlmostAtheist
    AlmostAtheist

    My friend, folks aren't replying because they don't want to; they're not replying because they just don't know what to say. (It's true, I called all of them and asked! Swear to God!) ;-)

    I find the world much easier to accept with the idea that there is no god running it, or even interested in it. It makes so much more sense that way.

    I'm sorry you've been shat upon so much. It isn't fair at all, and you have every right to be angry about it.

    I do hope that things turn around for you. You sound like a reasonable candidate for bankruptcy, have you looked into it? A fresh start might make those entry-level jobs give you the cash you need to get back on your feet.

    People are reading because you posted, they do care about you. Don't misread their motives. You're cared about.

    Dave

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    sixty-one views and one comment? I can take a clue. I can take a clue.

    wow, AB, thanks for discounting me.

    Christmas Eve, slow night, and I have hardly commented for a few weeks.

    Try to look at the light side of things.......pm me your tellie number and I will call you :)

    (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((AB))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

    you have been having a rough time........and I felt like I was hard on you, but its tough going when you get hit one right after another with hard things to deal with.

    purps

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    Sometimes, especially when things look impossible, just wrap your arms around yourself and give yourself a big hug. Then, tell yourself that you love yourself - and mean it.

    hey AB,

    do you remember posting this yesterday for Vitty?

    purps

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Abandonned - I am replying on the first read - Swear!

    This season makes a lot of people nervous. Money is tight, materialism is rampant, friends are not. And jobs are insecure in the world.

    I have had a go around in the workplace just the past two weeks also, in which I was worried that if the 'politics' went the wrong way I could be in the unemployment line before the new year. I thought that the supervisor who was hassling me would be transfered to another shift at the start of the year, and the pressure would be off. Not so easy. I find he is still assigned to our crew till March, which means at least three months more of 'walking on eggs'.

    I am not a financial counselor, but it appears that you are clearly at the end of your 'financial rope'. Sometimes the only way out is thru bankruptcy - though only you know if that is the right thing for you.

    Do you honestly think that God is to blame? I have often wondered in my own life if I should be mad at God. He did, after all, leave me floundering in a cult for most of my life to this point. Not everything in my life has been smooth at times. Still, we all make our choices and have our share of bad fortune, and, at least for me, it makes better sense to understand it that way. I often reflect on the meager life of a peasant living day to day in a jungle hut, hoping to live until 35 without Malaria, or another war taking his life. I cannot change that for him, but understanding that many have it far worse, in more serious ways, than I do, helps me to keep honest perspective.

    Good luck to you. I truly hope things improve for you soon.

    Jeff

  • lonelysheep
    lonelysheep

    I do hope you'll find peace soon, (((Abandoned))). Being mad at god can eat you up inside and can cause a delay in taking initiatives to improve your current life situations.

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    I feel for you abandoned (and purplesofa) but like Almost Atheist pointed out, I'm sure many here like me are finding hard to know what to say. Life sucks but I really don't think our human condition and the troubles we are pressured by have anything to do with imaginary sky gods.

    I can only wish you the best for a fresh start next year my friend.

    unc

    god is in the house

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    ((( ab )))

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