For a long time I never left him alone with the kids because when I did he would preach to them even though he promised not to. Never trust a jw spouse, sad but true. It is quite difficult to do, never leaving them alone with them but I was determined.Basically you give up any sort of life you may have to protect the children from psychological, physical, emotional and spiritual abuse. Mine were older but even young children can understand hypocrisy and injustice. I never hesitated to say what was going on with certain posters and the stories here or elsewhere. They would often ask, 'how's that lady, or kid or whoever'. They also could see the many negative changes in their dad. Yes, at times I let him hang himself with his stupidity and forgetfullness about their lives. At one time I would try and cover for him or add to the conversation in a way to remind him of what was going on. No more. Oddly he can tell you about kids at the kh but not know some of the same things about his own kids. (if the subject even comes up)
As for holidays and such we continue as we always did (house was non jw for about 18 years). You can talk to your kids without becoming 'preachy', small comments such as, 'Paul even said....., Christ never....etc... And I have always said they don't have to believe me about any of this, they can certainly research for themselves. But just seeing a few of the flip flops (Romans, rape, etc...) or when they flip flopped on where a script was first Satan then said it was Jesus, that pretty much takes the cake for them anyway. How can you put your faith in an org that can't even distinguish between Christ and Satan?