Were you an innocent bystander or a deliberate dirt digger?

Jourles

The title of the thread is more geared towards those who found out the truth about the truth via the internet. The very first time the word "Jehovah" or "Watchtower" appeared in a negative light on your computer screen, were you casually surfing the web as a good little jw, or were you intentionally searching for an explanation over something you knew to be wrong in the organization?

For me, I started visiting H2O back around 1996. I think I simply plugged in "jehovah" in a Netscape seach engine and viola! - there was H2O. I was an innocent bystander who got caught up in trying to defend the WTS. H2O seriously confused me at first. I was naive enough to think that real jw's were frequenting the board but had an axe to grind. It didn't take very long until names such as "Liberal Elder" and "Liberal EX-MS" caught my attention. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I got shot down time and time again. I then just lurked for a while. At the same time, I started to do my own research on things I couldn't defend. Reading Crisis of Conscience sealed the deal a few years later.

So which was it? Were you an innocent bystander or a deliberate dirt digger?

lost_light06

I was deliberately looking for the dirt but I was actually hoping to be able to "shoot down" any of the negative evidence those "apostates" supposedly had. I wanted to be able to see their "beefs" and tell myself they were full of $h!t and reaffirm to myself that the troof was the truth. I failed miserably. COC sealed the deal for me as well.

What-A-Coincidence

what lost light said

BlackSwan of Memphis

Eh, it started with silentlambs in the Detroit News and it was all downhill from there. I refused to believe it, set out to reinforce my faith and now look at me, I'm the spawn of the Devil.

mrsjones5

I'm proud to say that I was a deliberate dirt digger.

Satanus

I also was an innocent, although i was in a weak state, by wt standards. Another jw, who had a long history in the wt, deep knowledge, and was sometimes called a border line apostate introduced coc to me as a book by an xgb member, who described some of the secret gb meetings. My curiosity got the better of me, and i started reading it. However, once into it, my eyes were opened, and then i became a muckdigging apostate. I dug and dug for a few yrs. I also became a christian, which lasted for about 2 yrs.

S

Finally-Free

I was a deliberate dirt digger. I started searching when a JW child abuse case was in the local news, and the story mentioned the silentlambs web site. I devoured that site and several others, comparing what I read to what was in watchtower publications and other sources. Everything I believed in died during a single afternoon of research.

W

95stormfront

I'd stop going to meetings lng before I started "digging in the dirt". But once I started digging, I found that there were people who felt the way I did and could put it into words, something I couldn't quite do. Crisis of Conscious sealed it for me as well.

megsmomma

I was lucky to have found so much information when I finally decieded to "make the truth my own". I had so much guilt for years about leaving...then I found out that the organization is a bunch of crap...and there went my guilt!

lovelylil

I am a deliberate dirt digger! The thing that got me into digging was that I realized the whole "spirit" of the organization was evil and I wanted to know why when it was supposed to be blessed by God. Lilly

Were you an innocent bystander or a deliberate dirt digger?

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