Well that was a hard phone call to make (page 3)

SixofNine

So sorry LovesDubs. If you're asking me, I say yes, fly there as soon as possible.

SixofNine

Being touched by a life, and touching others...
...yeah, well, you know what I mean... words fail...

I know what you mean, but re: words, indeed they do fail.

I think perhaps I've been a little hyper-aware of that fact from too young an age though.

Lady Lee

Somethign I always knew intuitively but learned there was a term for was "being with the person"

It's good to know you will follow her lead and go where the conversation leads you both. It is a hard thing to do especially when inside your heart is breaking.

Sometimes they need an ear. sometimes a shoulder and sometimes just a quiet time with an old friend

My heart goes out to both of you

and those images - courageous and beautiful

SixofNine

I finally got to see Betsy today. She's in good spirits, considering. The chemo is harsh, the cancer is more harsh. Pain and nausea all the time. It's much different than her bout with breast cancer.

I brought her a bouquet of flowers (hush you!). lol, when standing in line to buy them, I suddenly started stressing about whether or not you should give something that is going to wilt to a wilting person. Stupid, I know. She loved them.

She brought up the fact that from everything you hear, you only get 6 months to live from the time you're diagnosed. She said "I don't feel like I'm going to be dead in 6 months". All I could say was to remind her that anything can happen, there is the occasional rare story of a person living for a few years. But none of the conversation was wrought with emotions; she's very calm about it all. We talked a lot of politics :)

She mentioned that she is angry (in context of talking to her priest. at god? I don't know for sure...I think that might be her meaning) about this happening to her, getting hit with cancer twice, and this one so radically. She has a twin sister who's had none of this...not that she'd want her to.

I'll see her again Saturday at a birthday party for our friend Ralph. She's very much looking forward to it. Ralph, btw, is shooting a documentary of her journey through this; I think it's amazingly large of her to be willing to do that. Her husband is a man of relatively few words, so it will be fascinating to see him on tape; she said he really surprised her with all he had to say.

We talked for probably an hour and a half or more. She made sure she was completely caught up on my life.

ps....I remember a few years back, fresh out of the org, Betsy and I had a "date" to go see Lucinda Williams at Bass Hall in Ft. Worth. I couldn't help but revel in the delicious normalcy of going to a concert with a married female (albeit 18 years or so older) friend, without a group or a chaperone, lol.

pss... I told her about posting the images here, and how many people's reaction was "what beautiful women". That brightened her day :)

Balsam

My ex-sister-in law is going through the same thing. She is bald but in good spirits. I talked to her last night. Of all the family she has been the one most supportive when I left her brother. Life is funny and strange and wonderful in the most amazing ways. She was telling me about a profoundly mentally handicapped young man she visits all she can in a nursing home and how much joy he has brought to her life. Here she is knowing if she gets 6 months that will be a long time and she is reading out to others. She used to care for this young man in the nursing home before she found she had cancer. I admire her courage and caring.

Wonderful wishes to your friend and praying we all can face our day with such bravery and plunk.

Ruth

wednesday

sixty

Those were beautiful photos. I too have friend who is very ill, and it has been hard to deal with their grief and mine too. One thing that helps me is, my friend is so happy and full of life, and loves life. They gave to others rather than took. your friend Bestsy looks like a giver too.

weds

Quandry

You are a friend when she needs one. This makes you a great guy in my book.

I sometimes wonder what would happen if I was diagnosed with some illness right now. After more than thirty years in the "truth" I find myself with no friends (I was always careful not to cultivate friendship with worldly people) .

At least this woman knows that she has friends to count on and visit her. A blessing.

SixofNine

meh... I'm just one of many friends this woman has. She's really so gracious. If I hadn't called her a couple weeks ago, or showed up today... or ever before she dies, she would not be hurt I don't think; it just wouldn't leave a big enough hole for her to notice, since she has so many people who love her unconditionally. I hadn't seen her for at least two years before this, maybe more. Don't take me wrong, I'm very glad I'm getting to visit her now and be a tiny part of this journey.

Quandry, I think many of us exJWs, and even JWs for that matter, really see what we are missing when we observe people with a loving community like this.

crazyblondeb

The women, and men, that fight cancer are a special breed. You pics are wonderful, their smiles priceless!! (Yes, and your pic, too)

My prayers and thoughts are with them all!

shelley

Wasanelder Once

Your pain has infected me, I am unable to see the screen clearly. I am so grateful that we cannot fathom the loss that is felt each and every day by all deaths on this earth. Thank God/whatever, that we can know a few well enough to weep for them.

Focus on the singular privilige of loving someone when they most need it. You too.

W.Once

Well that was a hard phone call to make

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