Letter from Mom...

by Odrade 66 Replies latest members private

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    Odrade

    You are right. The letter from your mom made it clear that she was looking for a response, and so it is a "time to speak."

    Your letter is well thought out; it is kind; it is mild and loving. You do not attack her position but explain your own.

    I can only hope it engenders the response you long to hear. The one that says that nothing will come between a family's love for their daughter.

    My own daughter at sixteen had the situation that you described about your friend --she was demeaned and humiliated,falsely accused of fornication and called a liar for over two and one half hours until after midnight by a committee of hateful men. She was made to read a scripture from revelation that said "outside are the dogs and the liars and those disgusting in their filth and they will burn in the fire with the devil and his angels." She was told that she was disfellowshipped and "if you are still disfellowshipped when Armageddon comes, you can take some comfort in knowing that Jehovah can read hearts."

    I also refuse to believe that these men were acting as agents of Holy Spirit, but were pompous men who chose to bully and "Lord it over" a young person who had no voice.

    How in the world could I and her father choose to turn our backs on our own child who had been treated in such a way by those who claimed to be "shepherds of the flock" but chose instead to beat the little sheep? We also will never condone or go along with such actions.

    I suspect that more and more people are reasoning in a similar fashion, hence the exodus from the congregations.

    Thank you for having the courage to post your letter. I hope that no matter the outcome, you feel satisfied that you have made your position clear and will not cower in the face of threats from the WTS.

    Quandry (clearly not hysterical)

  • Odrade
    Odrade

    Thanks folks for the comments, (waves at Euph, long time no chat.) "Funny" thing about this is that my parents are on vacation for 3 weeks- 2 more weeks remaining. Mom dropped her letter in the mail at the airport as they were heading out. A little passive-aggressive, huh? Well, at least it gives me time to not make a hasty response. :)

    My main concern is that the letter is so long. I do tend to shoot information out of a fire-hose when making a reply. But I've been over and over it, and can't really see anything I could leave out and still say what needs to be said. It's a shame it comes to this. Things have been on an even-keel with my Dad and brother for several months. It's always up and down with my mom. Still, there's ample fuel in the letter so it could be viewed as a "disassociation" if she chooses to look at it that way.

  • mavie
    mavie

    Good for you Odrade.

    The part that sticks in my mind is the sex offender bit. A similar situation arose in my KH as I was leaving. I asked the CO why it would be considered *slander* to tell others about this brother's legal restrictions. I was told to keep my mouth shut or face the consequences. I couldn't believe it.

    Let us know how this turns out.

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Great letter, especially if you think it may potentially be the last. I can only offer the following edits, because ya know how picky the WTS mindset can be:

    You have a repetition in Paragraph 11: "I know that when people leave the Organization, we often thought “what bad thing did they do?” or “what bad things did they did theywant to do?” "

    And is she familiar with the shortform of LDS for Latter Day Saints, or will she more likely know them as Mormons?

    Good luck Odrade, and regards to hubby

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    Great letter

  • SWALKER
    SWALKER

    Great letter! I hope it opens your mom's eyes a little....

    Swalker

  • Narkissos
    Narkissos

    Excellent letter Odrade, really. Very well thought and put.

    If you are looking for something to drop out I'd suggest the short paragraph about the cross. That would not shorten the letter much, but imho this purely religious topic might (irrationally) trigger the JW defensive mode unnecessarily and detract from the other issues which all have in common serious human consequences.

    I wish you the very best.

  • moshe
    moshe

    To thine own self be true- you have done that and more.

    A good job and good luck.

  • RAF
    RAF

    ... ... Wow ... (I couldn't stop reading)
    I hope she will realise what she have to from that ... Who knows? ... it's so well said.

  • LennyinBluemont
    LennyinBluemont

    Odrade,

    I totally agree that this is the time to speak. If not now, when? After all, she's invited you to explain (especially your husband).

    I would tend to agree to leave the cross thing out, not that it's a weak argument, but I think she will easily dismiss it, and it's unnecessary. What I would recommend is to expand the DF doctrine scripturally just a bit. Ray Franz explains that the scripture about not saying a greeting, based upon the context, is being applied only to one considered an anti-Christ. A total abuse of this scripture, which is then woven with other out of context scriptures to manufacture their totally unscriptural DF doctrine. JWs, as you know, maintain the position of ALWAYS respecting the scriptures. But I think you picked a good topic there to help her appreciate that there is a solid basis for your disagreement.

    Hugs and best wishes. Well done.

    Lenny

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