men are hateful (page 9)

deeskis

Morning (here) (((Crumpet)))

Hope you get a good night's sleep, and start the week off feeling better. I just got this email from a friend and thought you might find it funny!

To my darling husband,

Before you return from your overseas trip I just want to let you know about the small accident I had with the pick up truck when I turned into the driveway. Fortunately not too bad and I really didn't get hurt, so please don't worry too much about me.

I was coming home from Wal-Mart, and when I turned into the driveway I accidentally pushed down on the accelerator instead of the brake. The garage door is slightly bent but the pick up fortunately came to a halt when it bumped into your car.

I am really sorry, but I know with your kind-hearted personality you will forgive me. You know how much I love you and care for you my sweetheart. I am enclosing a picture for you.

I cannot wait to hold you in my arms again. Your loving wife.
XXX

deeskis

P.S. Your girlfriend called.

deeskis

Double post,.........

I had problems posting this, did it twice and didn't work, so split it up!

free2think

ROFLMAO That was too funny.

Axeman

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday
morning; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but
amazingly neither of them are hurt. God works in Mysterious ways. After
they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man. That's
interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing
left but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should
meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our
days". Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you
completely, this must be a sign from God!" The woman continues, "And
look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished
but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this
wine and celebrate our good fortune." Then she hands the bottle to the
man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the
bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle
and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.
The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" The woman replies, "No. I think
I'll just wait for the police .... "

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Women are clever, evil bitches. Don't mess with them.

Crumpet

In case any of y'all are actually serious, might be good to consider the number of humans in the world, then the number of men or women you've had bad experiences with. well, that's my brilliant contribution Flipper

Welcome to the forum Flipper - it really is true - dolphins are superbly intelligent and I have, to date, not had a single bad experience with a dolphin! Snorting with laughter at Deeskis! Thats so funny! Axeman - thats even funnier - and how right you are!

LittleToe

There is someone waiting for you out there, it will take a little time before you find each other.

What a load of b*ll*x! If they are waiting for you in such a manner then they are probably a stalker and you need to file a restraining order!

LT, of the "just being helpful" class.

free2think

LMAO LT, although I do see your point.

men are hateful

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