It was hard at first. The urge to try and help people you thought were your friends is hard to quell. But this weekend we had some JW family visiting and between their JW-related problems and all that drama it immediately stressed me out to the point that I felt like I was a JW again. I was angry and stressed and guarded and I realized it is not in the best interests of me or my wife and kids to stay so closely in touch with them. Not that I would shun them back (in the strongest sense anyways) but I am not going to seek them out anymore. It's not worth mental anguish - at all.
I feel like the friends I have made over the last two years are much more mutually beneficial than any of the friends I had for most of my life as a JW. Not that it still doesn't hurt from time to time, but in the overall picture my JW friends and family are less and less important.
And from what I can tell by the comments of others on the board they will continue to become less important.
-ithinkisee
Do You Miss Not Being With Your JW Family & Friends?
by minimus 33 Replies latest jw friends
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ithinkisee
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InquiryMan
I do miss them. Cause my mother and father and grand mother lives not far from me. And we used see each other pretty often when we were witnesses, even belonging to the same congregation. I am shun now by both my parents, my grandmother and my sisters and their families. It is sad, and I cry at times over it, but I am a survivor, so I´ll make it anyhow.... It is their loss. I miss sharing the everyday things, and being hospitable and generous to them. I do not miss my former friends, they were all nice people and we had many nice times together, but I knew this was going to happen. Howeverl I hoped my family was kind of different, but they were not. It is a strong cult. But I was a shunner myself once... It is sad, but part of life. They haven not even seen their grandchildren for more than half a year and live ten minutes drive away from my. That is not understandable to me.... I have my pride though, so I do not use the children as a means to see them. The kids do not ask about them, and they do not inquire about their grandchildren either. But it is prophesied in 2. Timothy 3:1-6, if memory serves me right, that there should be lack of love or natural affection in the last days... So here we go.
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blondie
Really you find who your real friends are.
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diamondblue1974
Mixed feelings to be honest.
I often wonder what happened to certain people and how they are doing but what makes me snap out of this is when I know they wouldnt even give me more than a seconds thought;
I now have true friends who are not conditional and are there for me as well as visa versa. - I dont miss miss shallow, self righteous, pious, judgemental, as well as stuck up people and I am thankful that I got out when I could.
All my true friends who were dubs left around the same time I did; we are still good friends even now.
As for family - my mother is still in and she is quite liberal where I am concerned - we agree to disagree but I know there is a line drawn whereby I know if given the ultimatum, she would choose the organisation.
Gary