When I first found this site I was overwhelmed by the diversity - Jw's are not accustomed to diverse ideas and thought.
I was obligated by the vast VOLUME of information that condemns the religion I had practiced for 4 decades - Jw's are not accustomed to facts and logical argumentation that defies the official position[s], to begin forming my own opinions from what I saw here.
I was speechless when I read the similar posts about things that I could have written, things that bothered me for the longest time.
I was overjoyed to realize that I was not alone in the world in my decision to leave the religion. I was terrified that I would be 'discovered' by lurking members of the organization, who would turn me in for disloyalty. I was impressed with the outstanding character of some individuals whom just months prior I would have considered evil to extreme. I was afraid to think on my own, to be challenged outside of the confinements of my closed mind, still heavily Jw. I was reticent to participate, as if the actual act of putting my fingers to the keyboard and making a comment crossed a line of some sort, making a return to the safety of the religion and the box it put God into more difficult from thereon, or impossible.
I was magnatized to the people, subjects discussed, and openmindedness I saw here. I felt an immeasurable attraction to those who understood precisely from where I was coming, and understood all the above conflicting emotions. I was impressed by those willing to defend the Watchtower, even though they hated the Watchtower, when facts did not support allegations against them. This was a significant impression for me. It convinced me that, although there are 'Watchtower Bashers' here, there was also deep character here, and integrity. I discovered that the motives were not what I thought they would be - that the motives were honest, often painfully deep seated, and amazingly similar to my own motives, though at first I did not recognize that too clearly.
Though fear gripped me in those days - I kept coming back - I finally posted and showed my face here. I have gained far more than I lost by becoming a member of this discussion forum. It has been worth years of therapy to me. It has condensed my exit process.
I hope that you - Dear Lurker - will allow the same in your life. Some of you may still believe the Watchtower dogma, most do not, and some may not be sure at this point. Yet - if what you had/have/want is the Truth, nothing here is a danger to that. Truth cannot be overturned with reason, discussion. If it is - then it was never Truth to begin with.
The Challenge
I do not challenge you to put you in danger. Only you can do that - and generally danger is only a relative perception to begin with. The healing process is vastly increased when we 'work through' the issues ourselves, divest ourselves of the mental roadblocks, and allow ourselves to begin thinking our own thoughts. You will not find 'unity' here - that is, of the Jw variety, where all agree on everything. You will find great diversity of thought, lifestyles, opinions, religion here. That is what terrified you at the start - Right? The very thing you seek, is the thing you fear the most - thought that is unfettered by a filter of suppression. Yet it is the only gateway to freedom.
So - are you willing to take the plunge? Pick a screen-name, one that is untracable to you. Register. And begin to heal with us. I believe you will find what you were looking for when you found the site - Truth about the Truth, and Truth about your Truth.
Jeff