my son's father is a JW

justmyself

I need some help. My ex-husband is a jw and he has stuck this religon so far in our son's head that he takes are son to meeting and I was okay with him taking him for awhile but, know it's gone to far and he has gottan re-married and his new wife doesn't like me because I'm not in the box with them. They are wanting to take my son from me because I'm a signal mother. Sorry my spelling is bad but if anyone could help me in this matter that would be great.... I don't want to get to personal. But my son means the world to me.

bernadette

Hi justmyself

very sorry about the awkward situation you are in. I'm sure you'll get lots of good advice here, personally I don't know much about child custody other than that it is very hard to take away custody from a child's mother even if she is a single mother. But of course when its a jw in the equation its often a different matter because they don't give up easily.

Take care and hang on in there

bernadette

justmyself

Thank you for taking the time to read this bernadette... It means alot..

Nowman

Welcome! They can't take your son away from you just because they are JWs, period. Unless you are hindering your son's welfare, they can't take him away from you. Remember, the JW org harbors pedifiles, and there were 16 lawsuits settled recently for victoms of molestation in the org, they were paid by the WTBS to keep their mouths shut, you can always do your own research and have this information in your back pocket. Also, you can read plenty of stories here of young people growing up in this cult, and you can read how its affected them!

Don't worry! You do right for your son, it will be OK. Do not be intimidated by the JWs!!!!! Be strong. Take a deep breath, do not let things get ugly, if he wants to get ugly, let him, but not you, it will only help you in the long run. Your poor son probably wants to please his dad and make him proud. Keep us posted!

Nikki

free2think

Welcome to the board justmyself,

thank you for sharing your story, you've come to the right place for help and advice. There are a lot of people on this board who have similar experiences to you and hopefully they can give you some advice.

bernadette

Thank you for taking the time to read this bernadette... It means alot..

no probs btw how old is your son?

Junction-Guy

Welcome. Im not sure of the right web address, but there is a website called www.jwcustody.com that helps people in custody battles with JW parents.

blondie

The important thing is to strrengthen your legal custody and exercise it as lovingly as you can. That site above can be helpful. You have just as much right to raise your son as you believe religiously as your ex-husband. His new wife has no legal rights and in God's eyes no spiritual rights.

*** g88 10/22 p. 12 Acting in Your Child’s Best Interests ***Never forget that the child has a right to receive input from both parents. Therefore, it would be shortsighted for one parent to demand prohibitions on a child’s attendance at or participation in the religious, cultural, or social activities of the other parent when the child is with that one. Likewise, it would be inappropriate for a parent to take an absolute position on a child’s school and extracurricular activities, association, recreation, or post-secondary education without due consideration for the other parent’s input and the child’s individual choices.

For example, in a number of custody disputes in which a parent is one of Jehovah’s Witnesses and the other is not, the couple have reached an amicable settlement by agreeing that the non-Witness parent will have generous time with the children throughout the year, including holidays and other times that are of special importance to the non-Witness. The parents have agreed to allow each other to have an active input into the educational, social, and medical issues affecting the children. After all, both parents brought the child into the world and thus have a natural right to have a say in his upbringing.

The Witness parent should encourage the child to respect the right of the non-Witness parent to have his own religious views and to express appreciation for that one’s kindnesses and gifts. If both parents consider what is best for the children, restraint and reasonableness can prevail over emotion and bruised pride.

JWs have to at least outwardly try to appear to be law-abiding when the law is not against God's and your custody of your child is not against the Bible. Abraham sent off his son Ishmael with his mother Hagar rather than retaining custody.

The important thing is to get good, sound, reasonable legal advice that keeps the emotional aspect lessened.

I grew up in a family with a JW mother and a non-JW father. It was a balancing act as a child.

Blondie

Junction-Guy

Wow Blondie, that has to be the best article I have seen from the JW's, it sounds reasonable to me.

aSphereisnotaCircle

Hi Justyourself! Welcome to the board!

I'll leave the advice to others who are more familiar with child custody cases, just wanted you to know your not alone, and there is plenty of helpful information here.

my son's father is a JW

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