So......online dating sites; yay or nay? (page 4)

Jim_TX

"...a single middle-aged man is really only interested in;

a) A short skirt and a pulse, followed by....

b) A waistline and some equity.

c) No dependant children."

Tim, you should put that in your profile whenever you create one for Match.com - or wherever you sign up.

Seriously! In my profile, I had a lot of similar words... and one of my 'requirements' said...

"Breathing. A Must!"

My wife - when she looked at my profile - liked it! She knew from that, that I had a sense of humor.

Good Luck, whatever you decide, but from your last post it looks like you are going a sensible route.

Just remember - with Match.com - if you are not sure - then only sign up for a month. Try it out. See what you are able to come up with in a month. Then let it rest for a bit. Come back in --- say 3 months. Sign up again - for a month.

Regards,

Jim TX

purplesofa

I used JW sites for dating when I was going to the hall. I met three brothers, both far, one in my country and one from London. The first one was a disaster, but the second was .........lovely to say the least. Of course it did not develop into marriage but I would not trade meeting him and caring for him over a two year period.

When I felt like my heart had healed a bit, I did match.com from my area. I never dated locally and am not the much interested in guys from where I live but I gave it a go. I went out with everyone that asked me. Sometimes I was out 4 times a week all with different men. It was alot of WORK!!! But I felt like my weeding out sensor was not too good so I wanted to say yes to all. After a few months of that I was exhausted.

I have found that meeting locally, one meets mush faster after meeting online----------- and that is not as protective of a feeling as the people that live far away. You bond more and can tell if its really worth meeting. And if there is not a click or chemistry on first date then there is not a second date.

I have made some great friendships though in my area, but no love connection.

I have trust issues from a very bad and messy marriage.

I feel comfortable with the people I have met from JWD.......I keep hoping I will be able to venture out from this circle.

You are a charmer Tim......so whatever you do, should be successful.

purps

Terry

When I was first divorced I did the knee-jerk sign up on Match.com and found out how quickly a couple of hundred dollars goes down the drain!

What it all comes down to is shocking. Read on.

You see, gentle readers.....what you have in common and how you look only seems to be the key to wonderful relationships.

However, it really isn't the thing at all.

It is undefinable and totally elusive CHEMISTRY.

You either click or you don't. End of story.

You cannot discover that with endless soulful e-mails, phone calls and pictures.

You meet and Presto! 30 seconds goes by and you "just know".

Then, what? Well, you feel like a fool, that's what.

As a result of this discovery I remain celibate and do not go out on dates. It has been a year and a half.

How is that working? It really isn't.

Why? Because I'm a human being.

Being alone can kill you. But, acting lonely is worse.

I tread the shadowed valley between those two mountains. I think I've lost touch with what makes me human now.

I'm fun, not ugly, young in spirit and quite smart, compassionate and tender with a keen sense of fair play. But, it doesn't mean spit.

Chemistry is everything and I've lost the key to the lab.

juni

Awwww Terry...... that's sad, but true.

I saw your pic and you're good looking. But to me that isn't everything. Personality and the guy's ability to show concern for others and me are at the top of my list. Honesty and moral values also. Not always having to be right (huge ego) is another consideration of mine.

I "know" Tim and he is a good guy. Very thoughtful and caring. Funny. Has a value system. And he's a humble guy. All very good qualities that a good women would be interested in.

Tim, don't give up. It takes time to find someone nice. As Xena said, there are a lot of frogs out there - but there are also princesses. I wish you the best as you deserve it.

Juni

cyberdyne systems 101

I've looked at them but wouldn't sign up to one. I just think if its all too obvious, its gonna be rushed or forced. Better in my view to join social groups that get you to see more people of the opposite sex, so much better if you can like someone and then something develops from there I recon.

I think its also good to not need someone in your life, but should they come along then they can enhance it. More and more people are going the single route these days, maybe relationships (romantic) are on there way out? I do find it odd that we have this in built desire to be with someone and yet it can be awfully difficult to do anything about it, and yet you see couple's all the time, so some are able to do the dating game alright.

CS 101

tim hooper

.......I keep hoping I will be able to venture out from this circle.

...and that's another thing!

These boards, and the wonderful people that hang out here are almost good enough to want to make me stay in at nights and not bother with real flesh and blood.

I'm a little bit shy in real life, and find it hard to accost strangers, but I don't want to end up as a perrenial board whore (if you know what I mean!)

Thank you all.

tim

Terry

Personality and the guy's ability to show concern for others and me are at the top of my list. Honesty and moral values also. Not always having to be right (huge ego) is another consideration of mine.

I wish I could believe that was true. But, demonstrably; it isn't. At least, not very.

I've simply never understood why women (generalizing here) think such men are nerds, boring, wimps, doormats. The female of the species likes rough-hewn asshole-type guys.

Don't say it isn't true.

Good Girl or Bad Girl?

I think if you ask Xena and LittleToe, Brigid and Daystar, GoodGirl/BadGirl and OpenFireGlass, and if I am missing someone please do remind me, I've drawn a blank, BikerChic and OnaCruse ... ANYWAY the point is these couples will all tell you that if you are NOT looking, and you open your mind and your heart, you just might find someone in quite an unlikely spot. Say, like JWD for instance...

What it all comes down to is shocking. Read on.
You see, gentle readers.....what you have in common and how you look only seems to be the key to wonderful relationships.
However, it really isn't the thing at all.
It is undefinable and totally elusive CHEMISTRY.
You either click or you don't. End of story.
You cannot discover that with endless soulful e-mails, phone calls and pictures.
You meet and Presto! 30 seconds goes by and you "just know".

Terry, I AGREE with these statements you have made, and I will tell you this: when you know, and when you feel that unquestionable chemistry, and that immediate bond and longing for that person, it does not have to happen in person. It can start with reading that person's words, and feeling touched by them, then it can develop into being unable to hang up the phone after talking for hours and longing for your next phone conversation which will be the second the both of you are not sleeping or working, and then doing whatever you have to do to meet that person, and then when you do meet face to face for the first time, after spending countless hours on the telephone hanging on each other's every word and swapping all kinds of stories, when you do meet for the first time, you just know that something special is happening that is about to change your life for the better and all the time you spent sweating your whole life about 'how the hell am I going to know when I've met the right person' because it doesn't matter anymore, because you just know, and then you do whatever it is you can do to be together, and you both are so focused on giving to the other person that it takes you a while to take a step back and realize that you both are getting exactly what you want and need and you both suddenly feel fulfilled and complete, like that part of your heart that seemed to be missing all of a sudden is whole. Oops, tangent. Did that make any sense at least, I hope? Not too sappy and cheesy, I hope. Ah, but I can't help it. Terry, Mate, hold on. Keep your mind and heart open. Don't go out looking for her, just FOCUS on LIVING YOUR LIFE and getting the most out of it that you personally can, and just when you have completely stopped looking for Mrs. Right, she may just fall into your lap. Literally or figuratively, time will tell. Also, don't give up on your personal standards and don't accept dates when you are completely plastered. I may be young but those are two things fast hard experience has taught me. Truly, (Timbo, Big Brother, my vote is for online forums about common interests, not dating sites, per se.) ~gg/bg

Mysterious

Honestly I dont know anyone who has had good experience with online dating sites, but I do know people who have met someone online. Why not join sites and forums on topics you are interested in and meet people that way? I have numerous friends who are in 2-3 year relationships now with people they met on gaming sites etc.

theinfamousone

ill be honest and say that i have hit a few of them up!!! and to be even more honest, i met some really cool people who are now good friends of mine... did any of it turn into a relationship, not really... i had sex a few times... but i mean, nothing serious, which at the time was all i wanted, so ok

the infamous one

So......online dating sites; yay or nay?

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