X MS, Elders, COs., and DOs.....your thoughts? (page 3)

Twitch

Good topic

I've wondered bout this from time to time when reading the boards.

(nods with wry grin)

Most elders can think of a time or times when they should have spoken up but didn't, afraid of losing their "position" and having the fury of the elders turned on them. But many are here now so. My husband did sit on many JCs but he spoke up. Probably why he didn't last long.

Elders are not a monolithic group. I have seen the deMEANing ones, well-MEANing ones, and no longer reMAINing elders.

Blondie

JK666

I feel worse now about the ones that I studied with and are still stuck in the Borg.

JK

Mrs Smith

I cannot remember where I read thisa A study of human behavior was done I think in England. They asked a class room full of teenagers to always pick line B no matter what the question was they then called in a guy and asked him to join the class. The had 10 straight lines of different lengths drawn on the black board. Line A was the longest. They asked the class which line was the longest and the whole class put up their hand for line B except guy who was not told to answer only B. He looked around and you could see that he was uncomfortable but also put his hand up for line B. He later said that he knew the answer was A but did not want to be different.

I think most of us are like this, we all at some stage of our lives have conformed to other peoples norm just to fit it and not draw attention to ourselves. In a mind control group this is even more likely to happen and it does.

I'm ashamed at the way I treated friends that were df. Yes, I confromed to the norm of my surroundings at the time something I hope I have learnt from and will never do again.

ilovegravy

Speaking as an ex MS, I can only say that I pulled my own plug before I would sell my soul to the grown ups in the wendy house at Crooklyn and even consider climbing the greasy pole higher up. To me the higher you got the less of an identity you had. .

As an MS we where the poor mans elder if you like. But I was always able to do my own thing, to push the envolope so to speak. I just didnt give a f*ck really what anyone thought of me, but towed the company line when appropriate if you know what I mean. So I tried the untryable just to see what responde I would get.

I was amazed I was actually made up. Maybe they where desperate. Or maybe they just realised that everyone need a little gravy in their lives lol

Uncle Gravy.

restrangled

Thanks for your responses everyone. It really is therapeutic to read how you feel now and I'm sure it is for others too.

r.

undercover

I only made it to MS...I was being groomed to be an elder at the time of my awakening, so to speak.

I was striving to be an elder at different times of my adult life of being a JW but for the wrong reasons. I just thought that was the next step...kinda like being promoted at work. It was someone else who told me that being an elder meant being a "servant". And you can guess that it wasn't an elder who told me that.

But having been in on JC meetings as a defendant, as a witness and as a spouse of a defendant, I saw the job of judge, jury and executioner as something that I wanted no part of. Something didn't jive about this aspect of being an elder, of serving the congregation.

I'm thankful that I never made it to the point that I ever sat in judgement over someone to the point of have them ostracized from their family and friends. To force someone into isolation as disfellowshipping does is the mental equivalent of locking someone in a dungeon, isolated from the world. The prisoner is never sure of what tomorrow brings...being released, more isolation or death.

I can only imagine how some of the ex-elders who have shared in inquisitions of the past must feel.

38 Years

I appreciate hearing your ~~comments~~, ~~experiences~~, stories. It gives me a better perspective. There were times when I felt bad for some of the brothers in the congregation. Now that I've gotten older, gotten out, and look back, I understand how some of the elders looked unhappy all the time. I used to think it was because they had so much responsibility and they had tough decisions to make. I would hear gossip that the elders weren't getting along. But I realize now that some of them were probably trapped just like I was. You could tell which elders felt bad about JC decisions, and which ones were on a power trip.

Sorry about the strikethroughs. I still have those dub catch-phrases in my vocabulary.

jeanV

Mrs. Smith, that study is mentioned in the book "why we believe what we believe" a book that all JW should read.

I also feel sorry about a few things I did/didn't do. As to JC, I always tried not to DF and managed quite well. Fortunately I have always worked with elders that were open minded.

X MS, Elders, COs., and DOs.....your thoughts?