Wow. The blog that is meant to "expose" Silent Lambs is beyond sad. They choose sentences from the WT that make it appear that the WT encourages abuse victims to report the crime. Truth is, when the entire subheading is read, it's shown that trying to apply what the WT is saying leads to doubt and confusion for the victim.
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w9511/1pp.27-29ComfortforThoseWitha“StrickenSpirit”***
What
oftheAlleged
Abuser?
A person who actually abuses a child sexually is a rapist and should be viewed as such. Anyone victimized in this way has the right to accuse his abuser. Still, an accusation should not be made hastily if it is based solely on “repressed memories” of abuse. In this case the most important thing is for the sufferer to regain a degree of emotional stability. After the passage of some time, he may be in a better position to assess the “memories” and decide what, if anything, he wants to do about them.
Consider the case of Donna. She reportedly had eating disorders and went to a counselor—apparently one of dubious competence. Soon she was accusing her father of incest and he was taken to court. The jury was deadlocked, so the father did not go to prison, but he was left with $100,000 in legal bills. Then, after all that, Donna told her parents that she no longer believed that the abuse happened!
Wisely, Solomon said: “Do not go forth to conduct a legal case hastily.” (Proverbs 25:8) If there is some valid reason to suspect that the alleged perpetrator is still abusing children, a warning may have to be given. The congregation elders can help in such a case. Otherwise, take your time. Eventually, you may be content to let the matter drop. If, though, you want to confront the alleged perpetrator (after first assessing how you would feel about the possible responses), you have a right to do so.
During the time that the one experiencing “memories” is healing, awkward situations may arise. For example, an individual may have vivid mental images of being molested by someone he or she sees every day. No rules can be laid down for handling this. “Each one will carry his own load.” (Galatians 6:5) Sometimes one may feel that a relative or a member of one’s immediate family is involved. Remember the dubious nature of some “repressed memories” when it comes to identifying the one suspected of being a perpetrator. In such a situation, as long as the matter has not been firmly established, keeping contact with the family—at least by occasional visits, by letter, or by telephone—would show that one is trying to follow a Scriptural course.—Compare Ephesians 6:1-3.
What
CanEldersDo?
If the elders are approached by a member of the congregation who is experiencing flashbacks or “repressed memories” of child abuse, two of them are usually assigned to help. These elders should kindly encourage the afflicted one to focus for the time being on coping with the emotional distress. The names of any “remembered” abusers should be kept in strict confidence.
The elders’ primary task is to act as shepherds. (Isaiah 32:1, 2; 1 Peter 5:2, 3) They should be especially careful to “clothe [themselves] with the tender affections of compassion, kindness, lowliness of mind, mildness, and long-suffering.” (Colossians 3:12) Let them listen in a kindly way and then apply healing words from the Scriptures. (Proverbs 12:18) Some who are afflicted with painful “memories” have expressed appreciation for elders who make regular visits or even telephone calls to check to see how they are doing. Such contacts need not take a lot of time, but they show that Jehovah’s organization cares. When the afflicted one realizes that his Christian brothers truly love him, he may be helped to recover a considerable degree of emotional balance.
What if the sufferer decides that he wants to make an accusation? Then the two elders can advise him that, in line with the principle at Matthew 18:15, he should personally approach the accused about the matter. If the accuser is not emotionally able to do this face-to-face, it can be done by telephone or perhaps by writing a letter. In this way the one accused is given the opportunity to go on record before Jehovah with his answer to the accusation. He may even be able to present evidence that he could not have committed the abuse. Or perhaps the one accused will confess, and a reconciliation may be achieved. What a blessing that would be! If there is a confession, the two elders can handle matters further in accordance with Scriptural principles.
If the accusation is denied, the elders should explain to the accuser that nothing more can be done in a judicial way. And the congregation will continue to view the one accused as an innocent person. The Bible says that there must be two or three witnesses before judicial action can be taken. (2 Corinthians 13:1; 1 Timothy 5:19) Even if more than one person “remembers” abuse by the same individual, the nature of these recalls is just too uncertain to base judicial decisions on them without other supporting evidence. This does not mean that such “memories” are viewed as false (or that they are viewed as true). But Bible principles must be followed in establishing a matter judicially.
What if the one accused—though denying the wrongdoing—is really guilty? Does he “get away with it,” as it were? Certainly not! The question of his guilt or innocence can be safely left in Jehovah’s hands. “The sins of some men are publicly manifest, leading directly to judgment, but as for other men their sins also become manifest later.” (1 Timothy 5:24; Romans 12:19; 14:12) The book of Proverbs says: “The expectation of the righteous ones is a rejoicing, but the very hope of the wicked ones will perish.” “When a wicked man dies, his hope perishes.” (Proverbs 10:28; 11:7) Ultimately, Jehovah God and Christ Jesus render everlasting judgment in justice.—1 Corinthians 4:5.
