When Did You Start Feeling Uncomfortable In The “Truth?”

by The wanderer 41 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  OnTheWayOut

  I started to feel uneasy after we studied the 1995 doctrinal change magazine and nobody
  really noticed it was a big deal. It was like "Mother said it's changed, so it's changed."
  That was the reaction of those who "got it." Most dubs didn't really get it. The uneasiness
  grew over the years, but I managed to put it in the back of my head.

  The uneasiness changed to extreme discomfort at an elder's Kingdom Service School in
  2005, when they made the existing policy clear that elders could remain on the body if
  they did some of the things other publishers would get reproved for, as long as they kept
  the "sin" secret for three years which proved Jehovah's spirit was operating thru them after
  the "sin." This told me that elders and higher ups were privileged to be in a separate class.
• 

  bigdreaux

  i never felt comfortable in it. i would go through my "spiritual phases" usually after i got caught doing something bad. case in point, the only reason i got baptised was to get the heat off of me from getting busted stealing cars. i would do things to please my parents. the more i "made the truth my own" the more i was sickened with my own actions. i felt worse going in service than i did stealing cars and slinging dope.

  i always knew something wasn't right with the org. but, being raised in it and not being able to question, it wasn't until i was on my own, i finally started to really think. i still thought it was the truth and i was just a bad seed. it wasn't until the glorious invention of the internet, thanks al gore, until i really was able to see how many people felt like i did and were able to thoughtfully question their doctrine. that's when the flood gates opened, and i really did alot of research. the more i learned, the more i despised it.
• 

  TopHat

  The first time I attended an assemby....was sooooooooooo boring.
• 

  changeling

  Being raised a witness I always felt slightly uncomfortable about certain things, but I was taught to brush aside doubt and trust in Jehovah. I was also conditioned to think I was at fault if anything seemed wrong. I did not study enough, or go in field service enough, or pray enough, or have enough faith... When I stumbled on the UN/NGO fiasco, something just clicked. I was able to allow myself to think and put 2 and 2 together. It was the end for me.
• 

  Brain Dead

  When they changed the seats at my kingdom hall to ones which were smaller, this was done I guess so more people could fit in the hall

  it was very embarrassing to have to go home with a chair attached to my ass, let alone to drive home........why did god do this to me why ?
• 

  nvrgnbk

  When I was four and I wondered "but where did God come from".

  Yup. Kinda like that.
• 

  Little Drummer Boy

  In the end, after I had become "spiritually weak" , I began to question the validity of the Bible itself, and then religion in general as having "truth".

  However, I suppose that I became uncomfortable at first because no matter how much I did, how hard I tried, it was neverenough. You all know what I mean. The never ending grind of weekly meetings, assemblies and service that beat the crap out of all of us, while all the time being told to "Do more" was just too much for me. I honestly think that if the borg would let up on members that people wouldn't fall away as much. There was a time when it could be fun (at times) to be a dub. We were happy to see each other and be together. I think it all started to change in the mid '90s. Before then, I remember parties and get togethers. Softball with the congregation at cookouts. The things that draw people together and make them real friends. Then all that stopped. There wasn't time anymore to be recharged or refreshed. Just the grind of it all. Just Jehovah, Jehovah, Jehovah and don't you dare think of anything else.

  LDB
• 

  Vinny

  When preparing for Revelation, book of Daniel and Isaiah's Prophecy book studies. Especially the anti-typical, modern day applications of some of that stuff. Re-read three times, shake the head and throw the book down.
  
  Then when my DF'd son went back to the meetings for over three months and afterwards said it just was not for him. The people in the Hall were so weird and had no life. I started looking at them from a different angle and could see what he meant.
  
  Then the internet, and finding out about all the false predictions, medical disasters and doctrinal flip-flop mistakes blew the lid off.
• 

  watson

  Around '67/'68 when the big push was on for 1975. The family was driving through a large city, and I asked my father "are all of these people going to die at Armageddon?
• 

  purplesofa

  The most uncomfortable I ever felt while still going to meetings was the night I sat in the hall and looked around at the people that and the thought came over me, that I did not want to be in paradise with any of these people.

  The next time was when reading Crisis of Conscience, the Malawi part.

  purps