Still recovering! Am in my last year of my nursing degree at university, and- surprise surprise- I'll be the first in my extended family to graduate. I remember when i was in school my mother said she was happy if i were to become a bank teller!!! However I have this obsessive drive to complete more & more post-grad education......i think partially related to that i feel i need to prove myself to those JW's, related & non-related, that i'm a good person/not evil/no drop out....has anyone else experienced this? should i be starting a new thread lol? oh, relating to the question....yes it killed a hell of a lot of drive, probably due to turning into a zombie at those b-o-r-i-n-g meetings.
Did Being One Of Jehovahs Witnesses Kill Your Drive?
by The wanderer 28 Replies latest jw friends
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Flowerpetal
Not kill my drive but maybe suppressed it somewhat until an elder's wife (many years ago) told me about someone she knew who was depressed a lot, and she went to a doctor (don't know if it was an MD or Psych) but she was told she needed to do something creative--so she started painting and her depression went away. So I started wondering if that was why I would get depressed sometimes---because I needed to do something creative--which I did and I felt much better. Also I have found a vocation which I love--just sorry I didn't discover it earlier in life.
This is part of self-discovery...to realize that we are here to contribute something that matters to humanity/the world to make it better. It could be in the arts, (including medical arts), or whatever it is that makes us happy. Certainly being told "NO!" at the doors all the time could make one feel horrible--and I'm sure our Creator didn't intend that.
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everyplanetwereachisdead
Id say yes. Being told no all the time killed alot of my drive. I got used to not living. I got tried of struggling for every bit of freedom. It definitaly killed my drive. I dont even know what to do with myself anymore.
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SirNose586
Yeah, I'd say I feel bummed right now. It feels good to miss meetings or otherwise shirk responsibility. I think I'll get my drive back when I get out.
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nvrgnbk
When I was a Witness, I wanted to die.
So yeah, I guess you could say it killed my drive.
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tim hooper
They didn't exactly kill my drive (I was actually more driven to see them proven wrong), but it sure put limits on my self-esteem and self-confidence.
I still have feelings of inadequacy and intense self-doubt- but not about my choice to leave.
Thank you, Hobo! My sentiments exactly.
On the other hand; maybe I would have been just the same way even if I hadn't been born a JW? Now there's a scary thought....
tim
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JK666
BigDreaux,
I could always get an extra 30 yards picturing my ex-wifes face on the ball.
JK
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JK666
YES!
After getting free from the cult, I got my associates and bachelor's degrees in 3 1/2 years. Got my BS with a 4.0 GPA.
Pray that you can overcome the "in the box" mentality you were trained to have.
JK
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sassy-ex-jw
The one thing that was killed while I was a JW was that I was never allowed to participate in extracaricular (sp?) activities. I resent that now as I would love to play things like hockey and baseball etc. Because of this, I find that at 36, I'm new to it all and no one really wants me on their team... ha ha ha...
It's one thing I wish I would've taken up all through school just for the fact that physical activity is healthy!!
In regards to other things, I left at a fairly young age (17) and figured I had 2 ways to go... drug addicted, street kid that supports her habit through prostitution.. OR get job, work your ass off and accomplish all the goals you want to! So I chose number 2 and am happy for it!