by jwfacts 46 Replies latest jw experiences
Not sure if it was a bane or a boon, I would have liked to have had sex many times as a teenager, instead of having a girl (at 21) ask me if I had done this before. Looking back, the very thought is extremely embarassing.
Missing many school events because of a Friday night bookstudy. Not playing High school sports, despite having a great amount of talent.
Nevertheless, I have a wife of 15 years, no known illigitimate children and never had an STD.
College would have been nice as well.
I don't spend much time regretting my choice in being a JW, and it was a choice. But when I do indulge in feelings of regrets occasionally here is what I regret about the 30 years I spent as a JW.
That I didn't pursue a college education in world religions and languages.
That I stayed in a bad marriage for so long because I imagined that God required it of me.
That I raised my beautiful sons in that religion because it hurt them in ways I can't undo since I left.
That I froze my ability to think and reason and allowed other people to do my thinking for me willingly.
Today my life is happy, and I don't hate the entire time I spent as a JW it was about 50/50. I loved the sense of community I lived in for 30 years and I was treated good by all my brothers and sisters while I was a JW.
yeah, there's no point in regretting the past, but it is a pity we weren't allowed to get an education or learn a trade so we could have a decent living. And the damage done to the personality is hard to overcome, loads of guilt and shame, perfectionism, judgmentalism, the difficulty in opening up and trusting people. But, my life since leaving the org. has been a lot of fun, even though it sucks at the moment. That too is transitory.
Welcome, sbnightrider! Tell us more about yourself............
Mother's Day, Father's Day, Birthdays.
Holidays are no big deal to me, but I could see folks with children being sorry they
cheated them out of this.
I never got the chance to live, experience life and form good memories to reflect upon and laugh at later. My childhood sucked. I spent it locked up inside my house playing Nintendo because my parents wouldn't let me associate with any "worldly" kids, and I never wanted to hang out with JW kids. I cherish the few memories I have of playing at my best friend's house when I was in junior high. My mom caved in a few times and let me go over, but it was very infrequently that she did.
I never got the chance to go to hang out with friends in high school, go out on dates, play in team sports or go to prom. Instead, I was a loner who spent any free time in the library in order to avoid "worldly association."
I wish I didn’t have overbearing parents so that I could have gotten physical with that girl that wanted to jump my bones in junior high. I wish I had listened to that really hot girl that wanted to jump my bones when I was 19. Or that other really hot waitress that wanted to jump my bones when I was 21. I wish I had more relationships under my belt. Instead, I’m in my late 20s and I have no idea how to approach women. I can't use the ol’ "what congregation do you go to" line to break the ice. I'm something of a retard when it comes to the dating scene.
The past is the past. The only thing I can hope for now is to make some memories from now on and hope I have something interesting to tell my kids if and when I have any.
Oh how I regret believing that a teenager must grow up in a stifling atmosphere, not being able to live and enjoy life. I regret all the friends I could have known; all the friendships I could have had. I regret having to learn about the real "world" in my mid twenties, with everything seeming so new.
These are things that I now enjoy. I regret not discovering them much sooner.
Welcom sbnightrider!
Care to share more about yourself?
Frequent fader miles,
I regret the exact same things as you do. I'm still steaming mad about it. Still healing. Takes time.
What didn't you do because you were a JW that you now regret?
erica, rachel, shawna, nancy, ..... the list goes on.
tetra
