A call from the GRAVE!

by ButtLight 22 Replies latest jw friends

  • Gill
    Gill

    Could it be that the Crematorium had 'broken down' and failed to tell its customers.

    This is what I think happened.

    Deciding to bury this lady in the back garden instead, Harry the Cremator now turned grave digger had the task of opening the casket, after all it was much easier to bury a body than a whole casket with a body. He could sell this casket off to George the local undertaker who 'knew' of his little 'problem' with the furnace.

    Opening the casket he found Mrs Mac Donald dressed nicely in her best blue suit and lo and behold she was clutching a cell phone in her dead, white, little fingers. Harry's eyes gleamed with the pleasure of unexpected profit and he removed the phone from Mrs Mac Donald's grasp. Nice little clam style Motorola. This would go nicely on ebay! Or he could even keep it himself as a surprise gift!

    He hauled the stiff body of Mrs Mac Donald out of the casket and placed her in the wheel barrow that he had prepared. Quietly he wheeled the body out to the back yard to the pre dug grave, unceremoniously threw it into the hole and then refilled the hole.

    Suddenly a wicked thought crossed his mind. He took the cell phone out of his pocket and switched it on. The battery was well charged and there was credit on the phone. He checked through the address book. Jim, Karen, Alice and Paul were the listed names. Harry smiled wickedly! Well, it was just a little fun! After all he was doing them a favour disposing of their mother for them, he deserved a little extra pay back. Quickly, Harry rang each of the names three times and then hung up. He smiled to himself again! Think what a story they could tell their grandchildren! Yes, he was definitely adding a little fun to everyone's life with this.

    As for the phone, that was easy. He would simply remove the old SIM Card, pop in another one and 'Bob's Your Uncle' he'd keep this phone for himself!

    Feeling contented with his day's work Harry returned to the crematorium to await his next customer! He wondered what surprises he would find in the next casket.

  • Warlock
    Warlock

    You know, sometimes you people make what is so obvious, complicated!

    It was just mom, calling the kids.

    Warlock

  • outoftheorg?
    outoftheorg?

    This reminds me of an old movie I saw years ago.

    The only things I recall of it are the wealthy husband dieing, being cremated and kept in an urn on a shelf above the fireplace. So don't ask me any questions.

    They had a butler that despised the whole family for their " holyer/richer than thou attitudes ". He smoked a cigar and each time he passed the urn he tapped the cigar ashes into the urn.

    Towards the end of the movie, a lot of ashes had been donated to the urn. One person, I think the wife walked by and tried to move the urn, then yelling about how he had become heavier.

    For some reason me and the others in the movie theatre found that to be hilarious.

    Outoftheorg?

  • loosie
    loosie

    Okay.......................THAT'S IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    This place is getting scarier than the stock market. I'm logging off and leaving.

    Now look at what you did Butt ... you scared Warlock.

  • JH
    JH

    I wonder what her message on her answering machine would say while she was in the grave?

  • ex-nj-jw
    ex-nj-jw

    Ok, are you trying to convince me that there are demons? Now I'm scared to go to the bathroom again! Thanks Buttlight!! : (

    nj

  • lonelysheep
    lonelysheep

    Hi Buttlight!

    Did they watch the mom get cremated? Did they watch her ashes AND the phone get buried?

    The company won't have record of the phone call if it wasn't a billable call. Customer service will say there's no record, but they cannot see things that people who work in network can see. The call is in the system before the phone rings. I think her phone is in someone's living hands and not her dead ashes.

  • loosie
    loosie

    I wonder what her message on her answering machine would say while she was in the grave?

    I'm sorry I can't take your call right now. I am decomposing. I will call you back when I get some unburnt fingers to use.

  • juni
    juni

    Buttlight? You have to lay off that beer!

    Now go to bed.......sweet dreams hon!

  • AllAlongTheWatchtower
    AllAlongTheWatchtower

    I recall a couple years ago, hearing a story about a guy who put in his will that he wanted to be buried in his car. As I remember, there were some legal battles involved, something about having to have all the gas and anything else hazardous removed first (like the battery), but as far as I know after doing all the proper things, he got his wish. I tried to find info about it on the net, but right now any searches for 'buried car' bring up the stories from Tulsa OK that are blanketing the net right now, regarding an old car the town buried in the 50's as a time capsule, and is being dug up today or tomorrow as part of a ceremony.

    Maybe the ghostly lady can give him a call on her cell, and he can drive over and take her out for a date.

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