I will be seeing my JW in laws this weekend after a year . I think I know what you mean . Not looking forward to all the "theocratic" talk and glorious viewpoints from the DC they gleaned . Thankfully there will be 'worldly' relatives around to balance out the conversation . Still sucks though because they won't want to come visit us in our home because we are inactive , but they will make plans to do things with the other members of the family .
Visit with JW family
by Brigid 15 Replies latest jw experiences
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codeblue
(((Brigid)))
I too know much of your pain. I feel so detached right now from my family
As a Mom, who cared deeply for her kids...and now one has shunned me for 8 months...I feel Like I was never a part of my children's life.
Damn religion!!!
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Mrs Smith
(((((Bridgit)))) I know only too well how you are feeling. It's sad that faceless people on the internet feel more like family than your blood family does.
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daystar
I cannot even contribute financially anymore as I used to. What good did it ever do anyway?
When a person has a track record of bad financial decisions, it's best to withhold material assistance, but provide advice and emotional support instead, regardless of how the person may view you. If they continuously seem to require "bailouts", they haven't learned to stand on their own two feet and one will do a disservice to them by continuing to enable their lack of discipline and responsibility for their own actions or inactions. But, you know this.
We may only be, ultimately, responsible for ourselves and our young children. To allow others, family or not, to interfere with our own well-being, financially or otherwise, is to invite sabotage by another's Will.
That is not to say compassion and assistance and service to others is undesireable. On the contrary, it is a requirement for the Self, for the empowerment of the Self at very least. However, the best way to serve another is not always the most immediately obvious one, and only rarely is it the easiest.
Your brother, and your mother, must follow their own paths, much like your sister and father seem to be doing.
Regarding the literature... I know just what you mean. I think it was last year that my father boxed up all his bound volumes, etc. and took them to a Goodwill. I actually tried to talk him out of it. I asked him to at least put them on eBay, but (LOL!) he said he didn't want apostates getting their hands on them. I now wish that I had asked them to give them to me. While I am no longer tied to the dogma, it is a part of my personal heritage and always will be, and I am rather comfortable with that now.
I love you baby... love you, love you, love you... *kiss*
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AllAlongTheWatchtower
I feel you, Brigid. My parents' place is falling apart too, they were faithful members of WCG for years and years, up until Armstrong died and it splintered into various splinter factions. They saved all the old WCG literature from when they were in, there is one room in the house you can't even enter...about 3 feet in from either of two doorways is as far as you can go, the rest of the space is covered in boxes and loose stacks of booklets and magazines, nearly to the ceiling. It's a wonder the floor doesn't collapse.
I remember years ago reading a book, can't recall what it was...To Kill a Mockingbird? A Sherlock Holmes short story? Just can't remember...anyway, there were either characters in it who lived in a house full of newspapers which they had to crawl through in tunnels, or it mentioned a real life event of such a thing for a touch of realism. The people in the book, real or fictional, died of old age within the stacks and tunnels of paper...it immediately made me think of my parents.
Don't berate yourself for leaving as soon as possible, hell you do better than I can; I can't stand to even stay the night at my parents' place. I seldom get to see them, because it's a substantial drive up there, about 4-5 hours. They often try to get me to stay..."Oh, you've been on the road too long already, you'll fall asleep at the wheel" etc etc, but I always make whatever excuses I have to, and make the return trip the same day. Between the memories, and the deplorable condition of the house, I just can't do it. If I'm too beat to continue driving, I've got a friend who lives about an hour from them, and I call him to see if I can stop by.
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daystar
AllAlongTheWatchtower
You're probably referring to the story of the Collyer brothers.