Update on my Dad

by ex-nj-jw 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • ex-nj-jw
    ex-nj-jw

    Dad had a heart attack and stroke on Friday. They actually think the stroke started on Wednesday or Thursday, very mild and escalated on Friday. The doctors have wanted to place a pacemaker and internal def. for some time now but have been unble to do so because of his constant weight gain (fluid from congestive heart failure) and being unstable for surgery.

    He is on a ventilator as he is in a chemically induced coma to keep him sedated, therefore they needed to be able to breath for him.

    His blood count has come up and the INR levels are ok to proceed with surgery tomorrow. Test have showed that he has lost a significant amount of heart muscle, but his doctor thinks he will pull through. The surgery will include by-pass open heart surgery, placement of a internal def. and pacemaker. They aren't sure exactly how much function he lost or will be able to regain from the stroke, we will just have to wait and see how he is when he wakes up.

    My JW brothers have been emotionally supportive and did not know that my mother had not called us (the non-JW children), they were wondering why we had not come to be with them and did not know until I arrived. She lied to them and told them that we couldn't come because of work. They started to question her because they couldn't understand how work would be more important and that's when she finally called. Basically she lied to keep us away!

    We all sat down with mom, and to my surprise they actually sided with me and my other 2 brothers, sister who are not JW's. My mom stated that she did not want us there because we may cause a scene about dad not receiving blood! And she didn't feel like being bothered with us disagreeing.

    I told her that I would never go against his wishes even if I felt differently. It's his choice and I would respect it weather I agreed or not. She seems very indifferent to my brothers and I (the non-JW's) even requesting that we stay at a hotel (which we are doing anyway).

    Anyway, I've spent almost every moment with dad, holding his had and telling him I love him. It's been a very long day and I think I'll try to get some sleep.

    Thanks to everyone's concern and good wishes.

    nj

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    *sigh* so many things running through my head...

    best wishes to your dad

    Josie

  • exwitless
    exwitless

    Sorry to hear about your dad. It makes it harder when your mom is being cold to you. Hang in there and be there for both of them.

  • Mum
    Mum

    That's wonderful - the part about your dad's prognosis. It's also good that you're looking out for yourself and your siblings. It is good to hear that some JW's do consider family more important than a belief system at such a time as this.

    Regards,

    SandraC

  • freedomloverr
    freedomloverr

    ***Anyway, I've spent almost every moment with dad, holding his had and telling him I love him. It's been a very long day and I think I'll try to get some sleep.***

    (((hugs to you))))

    so sorry for the heartbreak this is no dount causing you....

    keep us posted on your dad.

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    Thanks for that update. It's good to know your family was so supportive, and that you were able to finally get your mother on the same page. Now you can just concentrate on being there for your dad. Best wishes, hope he pulls through.

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    So glad you are able to be there with your dad.

    Mom is a true dub. I was in her shoes once, maybe you were too. She has been programmed completely. It is not totally her fault.

    It is nice that your two brothers are supportive of you being there. Keep your temper. Mom is going through some rough times. Did your brothers get with the hospital liason committee? Maybe they could give out current information on what is allowed for your dad.

  • R.F.
    R.F.

    My heart goes out to you.

    I pray and hope for the best for your dad, for you, for all of you.

    R.F.

  • lonelysheep
    lonelysheep

    (((((NJ))))) I'm sorry your mom did that. I'm glad you can be there for your dad, and you're not alone.

  • DJK
    DJK

    I hope the best for your dad. I'll be thinking of both of you.

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