Did anyone here ever make the truth their own?

by slimboyfat 49 Replies latest jw friends

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  Narkissos

  But since you talk about the "truth" I want to bring up that I am a bit troubled by the notion of hierarchical falsehoods you implied somewhere deep in a thread now long lost.

  You say you can remember why Jehovah's Witnesses are wrong from a Christian perspective, and now know where Christianity fails from a historical perspective.

  But the question is can you remember why Christendom is wrong from a JW perspective? Remember in the same way that you can remember why JWs are wrong from a Christian perspective?

  Otherwise it seems you are promoting some sort of hierarchy of falsehoods.

  Is Christianity a better quality of falsehood than JWs in your view?

  I can't help finding this idea rather comical.

  slim,

  I don't exactly remember the conversation you're referring to, but I'm pretty sure that where you understood "hierarchy" I meant nothing but subjective or biographical sequence. Like anyone else I went through a number of successive standpoints in a particular order. Lukewarm Catholic childhood, then uneasy yet all the more zealous JW teens and early adulthood, then split and drift through mainstream Protestantism and out of it. This might make up a hierarchy if I claimed to have some kind of "truth" now, but honestly I can't -- I have become too sensitive to the "comical" aspect of such a claim, precisely.

  As I mentioned in one earlier post somewhere, there's still a sort of conversation going on in my mind between the different "characters" I have been. We can learn from each other to an extent, and anyway we're bound to put up with each other till the silence of brain death part us...

  To your more specific question, of course I can remember "why 'Christendom' is wrong from a JW perspective". But this cannot be the only "truth" anymore, there are too many other voices speaking. I would readily admit I still enjoy some of it -- the anti-establishment, anti-nationalistic, anti-racist, anti-militaristic sides for instance -- but that's about all. And I'm equally fond of some of Christendom's symbols and mystics which JWs reject. All of that is part of the strange landscape I have become.
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  keyser soze

  I gave up a lot for it, especially in my childhood, so in that sense I would say yes. On the other hand, there were always certain things that I had doubts about, so I can't say I gave my heart to it completely.
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  Finally-Free

  Did anyone here ever make the truth their own?

  Yes, I did. I pioneered™ and married a pioneer™. I put "kingdom interests first" in every area of my life. I even turned down employment numerous times because those jobs would have interferred with meeting attendence.

  Only encouraging comments please.

  I take that to mean you don't want to hear the consequences of my "making the truth my own".

  W
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  Quandry

  Oh, yes. Every aspect of my life was governed by "The truth." Even though I always felt the guilt of never doing enough or being good enough, I continued to struggle on. It wasn't until I came to this forum that I found out "the truth" was really "truth according to the dictates of the FDS."
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  ninja

  I pursued what I thought was truth...but when I found out it wasn't all it claimed...I was truthful enough with myself to leave and take whatever consequences came my way....I am still in pursuit of God and truth .....cheers slimbo....ninja
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  slimboyfat

  Narkissos,

  Fair enough. I did not read it like that at the time, but I can't find it now and I won't argue with you. On your nothing. thread you hinted at a another priority though that I also take issue with:

  I agree that "nothingness" as a concept and "nihilism" as an ideology can become meta-narratives, too.

  For half a second I agreed with you. But then I thought, wait a minute - why "can become"? Why not simply "is"? How odd for instance if one also said:

  I agree that Marxism can become a meta-narrative or I agree Christianity can become a meta-narrative.

  You wouldn't get away with that because we know they are such. So why does nihilism get a free ride? Because it combats narratives? The anti-narrative can't be a narrative! Does that make sense? In so far as nihilism makes sense at all it draws on discourse and arranges itself in patterns of thought just like any other system. Maybe there is a somenothing that does not arrange itself in this or any other way. But if it is named by this or any other name otherwise it is broken and relegated.

  But I just wanted to comment at how deftly you prioritize nihilism (the name you chose) while appearing to make a concession in its name.

  Don't get me wrong, I actually believe in "nothing" (with deep irony intended), but I see it as a project of unlearning everything I know. It is so easy and meaningless to say the words "I know nothing", but it takes hard work every day to truly know nothing, to unlearn the things I think I know. Today I was thinking about why I thought that men and women are different psychologically. I didn't know I still knew it until I thought about it. I knew I no longer believed the stereotypes, but the core notion that there may be unidentified essential differences remained. And now I am trying to break it down; it can't all be done at once. All that I know must be broken down painstakingly piece by tiny piece. I "know" I will never know nothing, but each time I think about something I previously knew and break it down I get a bit closer to .

  But I don't want nothingness to be a black hole I can't never escape even if good reason presented itself. So I need to call it by the narrative it is and not delude myself. I am like chipping away at the bricks of a building I no longer have use for. When/if I'm done maybe the bricks can be used to make something else, or maybe I will play in the sand. Maybe you are already at the beach. I loved to play in the sand when I was young. Can it ever be the same?

  Slim
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  greendawn

  It was not possible because it was not the truth and it would never work, it had effect on the deeper parts of the spirit.
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  Honesty

  Yes.

  Then I found it it isn't the truth and almost went insane.
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  Honesty

  Only encouraging comments please.

  My insanity lasted only a few weeks and then I returned to my normal happy self...

  I just didn't have the FDS to look to for answers to life and for that I am very thankful and encouraged.

  How's that for encouraging comments?
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  juni

  Slimboyfat?

  I bared my soul here and now I'm more confused. Was this post directed to something you had going w/Narkissos?

  And Nark? I don't know what the hell you're saying man. This is way over my head, but you know I love you, right??? (ha! never used those emoticons either)

  I take that to mean you don't want to hear the consequences of my "making the truth my own".

  W

  LMAO Walter! God you are funny. How's Rocco doing? I really don't know what slimboy was looking for actually. Ah well........ we love him.

  Juni