Goodbye, my sweet sister (page 3)

Lady Liberty

Dear Sweetface,

WELCOME to the forum!!

I am so sorry about your sister!! (((HUGS))) She is angry and frusterated at your decision and your lack of loyalty to God and what she believes is God's only channel. Hang in there. We all say things when we are mad that we don't really mean. The best thing you can do is to pray that her heart open for truth, and don't give up on her. Prove her wrong, be happy, and be the same moral person you always were. JWs have been brainwashed to believe that all who leave the "truth" are miserable and are wollowing in depatchery.

My father in law, when frusterated that he couldn't keep us (his son and I ) from leaving the organization said to me " You do know that if you go down this road you will end up divorced, and _____ (our daughter) will end up with no morals.. (blah blah blah)" I just looked at him and asked what in the world would make that happen? We still love Jehovah, and are still moral people still study the Bible, and are still instilling morals in our daughter. Why would we abandon Jehovah and Jesus? He just looked at me in that silly dumb confused look! To him it didn't compute!! Jehovah=The Organization.

I hope you stick around, as many if not most of us have gone through simular experiences with our loved ones. My own brother will have NOTHING to do with me, his parents or the rest of his siblings who have all left either. He has never even given me or any of us for that matter, the opportunity to explain anything to him. He just believed all the gossip and lies and is assuming they are true. Real loving hugh? We understand your pain. Keep your chin up. You never know what may make her stop and wake up one day.

Sincerely,

Lady Liberty

NotaNess

If love can make you feel as bad as I feel right now, how terrible is hate?

It is not love that makes you feel this bad, it is the Watchtower Society. THE BEST thing you can do in your situation is to live and lead by example from here on out. Live a decent life as you know it, don't get caught up in JW stereotypes for "Worldly" people, (even though they really are living "worldly" lives them selves and pretend they aren't).

You can still be a role model for your sister. Treat people with kindness, act loving, help people when you can, stick to good manners, don't get caught up in drinking and sex. I Hope you still wait for marriage(if you're not married now).

Keep to these good "Human" qualities (you know how JWs think they only have these qualities), and I think that your sis will open up to you, and maybe follow your lead, out of this mind contr-hole.

Welcome to the forum!!!

Quentin

Welcome sweetface , glad to meet ya...sad story, sadder it's you dealing with it....it being repeated many times over in the world of the jw's...can't add much more to what has already been said...come back often, read the best of section and talk, talk, talk....look forward to reading your posts...

Vinegar in freedom tasts better than honey in slavery.....old Serbian proverb....

moggy lover

Hi, SF and welcome to JWD. You have possibly taken, with the sole exception of a marriage vow, the most important step in your young life. It takes courage, resolution and a strong sense of awareness to make a decision such as leaving one's religion on grounds of personal conviction. There will be no going back, for what has been done will engender permanent emotional and psychological tremors in the deepest part of your psyche, which will last for as long as memory itself does. But it is for the good, for now, having discovered an awful truth about religions that promise so much but give nothing, you can benefit from an enhanced sense of maturity, that will characterize the rest of your life.

Go forward into the new dawn, for there is one waiting to unfurl, and rejoice in the unfettered freedom that life affords. You have begun to live anew, ennobled by your experiences, and your contributions to the world's stage awaits you. As does JWD. You have new friends here, raucous perhaps, but, who like you also have come to experience liberty in free expression. Here thinking is allowed, so think aloud. Not just your voice but your mind is welcome.

Be not harsh on your sister. Many cannot see the restrictive bonds that the WTS puts in place. In order for repression to succeed it must have a phalanx of deceptive order, as if marching tirelessly in step, for good or ill, is a portend of religious fellowship. Those such as she have been encouraged by the monstrous leadership of this system, to have this almost superstitious conviction that a malevolent fate, invested with divine wrath, awaits one who defects.

Rather await the day that her own eyes may be opened.

Cheers

Namasti

It never seizes to amaze me that this same thing happens to others, besides me, over and over again. WOW! -- that happened to me almost exactly. I cried the entire night after that conversation--I love my sister so much. I thought I had some great reasoning to hit her with that last conversation with her, but she just kept coming back with how I'm offending God. I'll never forget how awful that night was. Many wonderful people have come into my life since then--people that are very, very much like sisters to me. I had to mourn her, though. She came back into my life about 20 years later when I got seriously ill and thought I could die, but nothing was ever the same and we hardly speak now that I'm better. Our bond was forever broken.

My heart goes out to you with all my heart. You are not alone, you know. We all understand exactly what you are going through. Vent here as much as you need to. We are here to listen.

Nam

flipper

Welcome Sweetface, Mr. & Mrs. Flipper welcome you. I'm so sorry you had to go through this with your sister. As has been said by others, many of us have gone through just what you are going through, so take comfort friend , you are not alone. This site has a lot of caring people on it who will help you to hang in there. I have 2 daughters in their early 20's who are still in it who won't have much to do with me. But a 22 year old ex-witness son respects my stand. Also my elderly parents have respected my stand. Do you have some family who will give you support? If not, please don't hesitate to pm my wife and I if you want to unload. We understand. It's not easy. But please know you are among friends. Peace to you, Mr. & Mrs. Flipper

bluebell

welcome to JWD sweetface

LeslieV

Welcome sweetie....I cried for you when I read what you wrote,,,I sure felt your pain.

Most of us here know that pain only to well. My family has not spoken to myself or my three children in over 10 years. I have lost in death my grandparents, uncles in that time. and no one even told me. I read it in the paper. It is always amazing how cruel this religion is. Keep coming back we are here for you.

Leslie

Sunnygal41

welcome to the right place for support and healing!!!!

most of us here have a war story to share that closely mirrors what you've just gone through. I myself walked away from the WTS 8 or 9 years ago and have never looked back. My family pretty much shun me.........i have one sister.........my mom is terminally ill and we are "allowed" to talk about her health. i recently flew down to spend a week with her and was pretty surprised when my sister actually brought my two nephews over to see me and came for coffee. however, i have recently been told by my mom that she does not want me to call her house.........i called and left a coupla messages, GASP that I loved her and was thinking of them............of course it hurts, we are human, and love our families. as far as your sister taking your views, etc. as a personal attack on jehovah, it's because that's what we were taught, that those who leave or begin to question the organization no longer love jehovah, so we are to hate them..........it's classic mind control used by many religious organizations. be proud that you are smart enough and courageous enough to know something is wrong and no longer want to be part of it.........life is a gift to enjoy to your best ability.........so, don't let anyone try to guilt you into being miserable and staying someplace you know you aren't happy.

hugs,

terri

reneeisorym

I've had very similar thing said to me in the past and I know how you feel. My mom was the one doing it to me. You wouldn't believe it now but there is definately hope that things will change in the near future. In 2 years you two might just be best friends and both ex-jws.

I do have a little advice -- Prove her wrong. Live a good life and show her that you will still be a good person outside of being a JW. And also, don't give up contacting her. She'll probably lash out and really hurt you in the process but keep up contact with her in any creative way that you can. Realize that when she says hurtful things that she is just trying to show you how much she is hurting over this too. I know many who don't have the strength to keep up that relationship and that's ok too -- But I can see how much you love her and you don't have to give up.

(((hug!)))

Renee

Goodbye, my sweet sister

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