Went to a party last night...feel guilty this morning

by neverendingjourney 27 Replies latest jw friends

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  neverendingjourney

  I went to a party last night. It was relatively tame. There were maybe forty people there. I drank a few beers, smoked a few cigarettes, but I avoided the marijuana. It was a good time. Nothing crazy happened. However, I woke up this morning feeling guilty, and I don't know why. This was always the case with me as a JW. Every time I went to a worldly party, a bar, or a night club, I'd wake up feeling really guilty the next morning. I never felt that way when I went to one of those lame Witness parties or weddings. I even confessed to the elders about it a few times.

  I've been inactive for two years now and I no longer believe that the JWs have the truth, yet I wake up feeling guilty every single time I go out, especially when I smoke (I don't smoke regularly, just every now and then when I'm out at a party). There are still a lot of JW obstacles that prevent me from acting normal in these situations. Any thoughts on why I'm still feeling guilty?
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  mavie

  You are normal the way you are. If you don't want to do those things, don't. No one says you need to in order to be normal.
  
  It's hard to accept things for what they are.
  
  Hope you find a way through this.
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  horrible life

  Seriously, Next time you go to a party, don't smoke. Do everything else like you always do, drink in moderation, have a great time, but don't smoke. It may not be a JW thing at all. It may be that you know that cigarettes are bad for you. You may be confusing our society's smoking, with their society's smoking.
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  PrimateDave

  Yes, you're obviously not going to enough parties to sear your conscience. Nothing like a seared conscience for dealing with the morning after!
  
  Dave
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  stevenyc

  Neverendingjourney, To give you some perspective, last Friday night I went out to watch a movie and ended up in a bar. I drank waaaaayyyy tooo much and spent Saturday feeling guilty. I was pissed off with myself for getting so drunk. There was that underlying feeling of guilt I can trace back to the borg. But, Catholics get the same guilt, except they (admittedly a small group) will go off and flagellate themselves, be glad you don't feel the urge for that nonsense.
  
  Many people, whatever their backgrounds, get guilty feelings after excess. There are probably more people with guilt over eating candy than getting drunk once in a while.
  
  
  Don't fret over it. Get drunk once in a while if you like, it's okay.
  
  And, stay off the cig's.
  
  steve
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  aligot ripounsous

  I wonder, is smoking act normally or is it playing into the hands of tobacco firms ? I used to be a smoker and I feel more normal now, having plain control of my life. What I'm saying is worth just as a personal opinion, I would think the same even if I weren't (still) a JW, provided of course I wouln't be hooked on to the point that I couldn't even choose to stop smoking. I'm grateful to JWs they showed me 30 years ago what the Bible tells about not defiling our body, that probably saved my life. In another way (no religion there), I tell my children that no smoking conveys the message that they resist peer pressure and that's to be valued when teenagers are shaping their personality.
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  nvrgnbk

  but I avoided the marijuana

  That was your first mistake.

  Nothing crazy happened.

  Sorry to hear that.

  Better luck next time.
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  TheNaturalStep

  It isn't a sin to take some smokes, it is a sin to get addicted, but jv has banned it because it would be a bad example if you went around smokeing ... Also takeing some beers isn't wrong ... But i agree that you should stay away fromt eh cigarets you don't want to get addicted m8.
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  joannadandy

  As long as you are doing things you are comfortable with - there is no reason to feel guilty. If you don't feel comfortable with smoking - why do it? If ya like the occasional cig - so be it. Rationalize to yourself why you're feeling this way and eventually you'll be able to work through it.
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  Mincan

  don't smoke the marijuana if you are intelligent and want to keep it!

  I only did it once, and I notice a 20-30% decline in my logical/analytical/abstract thinking abilities, plus my memorys s*** now.